Flush, Cleanse, Repeat

My system is telling me that it's that time again to do a cleanse/detox/flushing of my system. I've been feeling a mixture of bleh and whackadoodle for the past couple weeks. I was chocking that up to the training/jogging but I think it's more.

For the next two weeks (we are have completed day three) we are doing a modified juicing that I prefer to call smoothie-ing... Doesn't quite roll off the tongue as well, does it? How about smoothing? Yea, we are smoothing... In a way that is exactly it.

We are replacing daytime meals and snacks with whole fruit smoothies. This way we get ALL the goodness of the fruits, veggies and greens. On an off the wall side note, unlike in elementary school, in the smoothie world yellow and blue do not make green. I was putting together a green smoothie mix and decided, "Hey, why not throw in some blueberries..." Yea, it came out purple... Because that's what blueberries do.

Today's smoothie was a delicious tropical concoction with mango, kale, spinach, arugula, swiss chard (all of these greens were "baby"), pineapple, kiwi, banana and I think a few strawberries. I just used a water base and added some vanilla protein powder. My not so "green" one from yesterday was all the baby greens (I got a big bag of the mix at Costco) with kiwi, cucumber, pineapple and the damn blueberries.

We have been having light snacks of apples or carrots and a little hummus just to help curb the hanger or as I like to call it hungry rage.

Speaking of hummus, this weekend when I went to make some I found that I only had one can of chickpeas and my recipe calls for two and I didn't want to halve the recipe (I actually have it already calculated but I know that I want a full batch). So, I substituted a can of great northern beans in for the second can of chickpeas. It gave the hummus an even creamier texture than I could have imagined. So good.

It was hard to slither out of bed this morning. We had an amazing and productive yet somewhat relaxing weekend. We took Friday off and busted our asses while the wee one was at "school"  to get her room and the hall bath painted. They were the last two rooms and it was an amazing accomplishment to get them done. We also hung the new mirror in the powder room ($10 at IKEA) and just tidied up overall. We then tried out this nice little bar and grill near us and we were glad we did. Great food and they are family friendly so bye-bye Denny's! (We are still getting our bearings in town and that was the only "safe" family restaurant we knew of that could guarantee food the tornado would eat.)

Saturday we went to Cabela's and bought a nice family sized tent to replace the 2 person tent we ditched when we moved in November. After that we went to Dutch Bros. and coffeed it up including a Carmelizer for my bestie on her big three-oh birthday. Now this may not sound super special but this Carmelizer had to make it 60+ miles surrounded by ice in a cooler to get to said birthday girl along with twenty goofy balloons. It would have been thirty but twenty is the limit in the back of Jude (our Ford Fiesta hatchback). The smile on her face and the hugs made it all worth it! Then once we got back closer to home we went to Portland Running Company and spent some time getting analyzed and trying on different shoes. The analysis is essentially they evaluate your stride and movement in different types of shoes. After four or five pairs we each found the One. Mine are Asics (a stray from my normal Nikes) and Collin got a pair of New Balance (he's vacillates between Asics and Nikes normally). If you are inclined to running and haven't taken the time to do this at your local running store you are missing out. I have taken the new shoes out on a couple jogs now and I am in heaven. They feel like they were tailored to my feet and I probably never would have found them on my own.

Sunday I (we) hit the burnt out stage from going, going, going the past two days. I dragged myself out of bed for a short run and subsequently got a mild chill from it. We went for a two mile walk as a family. We went to the store and we went to visit Collin's grandma. The tiny one was a bit startled to see Grams in bed, normally she is sitting in her wheel chair. Grams was tired and still fighting off a bug so we didn't stay too long. Afterwards we went home and I prepped the next two weeks of smoothie packets and then sort of fizzled out. I was chilled and tired and just not feeling too great. I dozed in and out on the couch for a couple hours. Collin tried to convince me to go upstairs, but I wasn't having it. After I was semi-recharged we made one more outing to the store and then settled in for the evening to relax and cuddle.

Yesterday was the great end to the long weekend. I got to see my bestie and her whole clan and then Collin and I found out that we could buy the demon cat's stuff at PetSmart for the same price as Petco (I honestly don't know where my preference came from). It's way closer than any of the Petco locations so it works.

And now I am running out of steam to type this. The first day back at work after any length of time off is like the transition stage of labor; you're in agony and you just aren't sure you can make it through.

I think I am going to snack on some greek yogurt and cherries or some carrots and hummus... Either way it's time for the nightly detox tea! (Yogi brand makes their's in a K-cup!)

**** I did not proof read any of this... Not enough focus.****

I... I Keep On Running

I think I am hitting the point in the C25K app where I am either going to push myself and power through or I am going to stop using it and focus on improving my pace using one set of interval times. For my overall goal, I want to complete another half marathon before my next birthday (in about eight months. Along the way I intend to do a 10k or two for fun and measurement. I definitely want to do a Thanksgiving 10k. It makes the meal that day so much more enjoyable.

Back to the current situation though. This weeks intervals feel like they are very close to the edge of being too much, but this could also be the weather today. Tuesday night was cool and cloudy and I felt amazing as I ran. Today, I still felt amazing but it was about fifteen degrees warmer and sooo humid and balmy feeling. It didn't really wreck my pace but it still was not as awesome as Tuesday; it was off by about twenty seconds per mile. I guess I should elaborate on the intervals; this week is five minute brisk walk warm up, 90 seconds of jogging/90 seconds of brisk walking followed by three minutes jogging/three minutes brisk walking. This is repeated twice. I found I feel best doing the 90/90 split. The three minutes is really close to my limit, and then the three minute walking is kind of blah for me.

Last week I really found that I felt great doing the 90/90 split and wanted to keep going beyond the thirty one minutes designated for the workout (on C25K). Next week will get more intense with the intervals. After the warm up it's jog for three then walk for 90 seconds, jog for FIVE and then walk for two and a half, jog for three and then walk another 90 before finally jogging for five, falling into a ditch and dying... Okay, dramatic, yes. I know.

I really want to see how much I can handle without going beyond the point of safety, so I am going to give week four a try and see how I feel. For the long term goal of getting my distance up for a half I think I will stick to a 90/90 or maybe two minutes jogging to 90 seconds walking.. We shall see.

Work was a little rough this week, but that is my lot being in the customer service world. Anyone who is working or has worked in this realm can understand; my job is to help my customers get there shit done, on time. When corporate politics start to interfere with that I get a little ragey. Some eff bombs were dropped (not to anyone in particular, just while venting to teammates).

The thing that helped me make it through today, which was the roughest of the week, was this face:

Knowing that this little goofball is waiting for me to come pick her up from "school" each day is all I need to keep going. This was from our dollar store dress up "party" we had this past weekend. She loves her wings and to wear costumes. She is definitely ours. 

This morning before we left she found her ducky. It kills me, when she "quacks" she sounds French. She's walking around swinging the duck saying, "Qua' qua'." Her vocabulary and word association is amazing for her age. Yet another reason her teachers tend to forget she is barely a year and a half old. Most of her classmates are two.

Oh, so I got my official Myers Briggs test results. I am a rare bird indeed. I tested as an INTJ, but barely. I was only one point over the line from INFJ as I had tested as before. The administrator believes that I must have felt more Thinking than Feeling the day I took the test. Also, since I took it at work that could have had some bearing on it as well. Regardless which side of the line I fall on with that specific preference I fall into a group of people who make up 1.4 to 2.4% of the world's population. Kind of nuts, right?

Now that I have a more professional explanation of the types, I can see how I go back and forth between thinking and feeling.

I for introvert; I charge my batteries by being alone and doing my own thing. Too much social interaction is draining.

N for iNtuition; I take in data and analyze it by looking at the big picture rather than just the single instance presented to me. I take this one thing, down here and I explode it into the whole cycle.

T for Thinking and F for Feeling; with the thinking I make decisions based on logic and facts presented to me whereas the feeling part of me makes decisions based on emotional reaction and other people's thoughts and opinions. (I can totally see how I may vacillate {love that word} between the two preferences depending on situation}.

J for Judging; the most misunderstood preference. In fact I think I may have described this incorrectly in my last post. This preference is based on how I like to complete a task once I have taken in the data and made a decision; I am a list person. I know, I know, for anyone who knows me this is no shock. I like lists and check lists and schedules and timelines. Prime example; I am off work tomorrow and have HUGE list of tasks I want to complete while the wee one is at school. I'm a planner; I will use any tool I can to make sure I get shit done. Lists are a key tool for me. 

Now to start re-watching Amnesia. It's an interesting twelve episode anime series I stumbled upon on Crunchyroll. It is one that leaves you thinking so I want to re-watch it to see if I catch more things the second time around. 

I'm thinking it's time for a new layout. I think I will be working on a new design this weekend. (the design currently in the background is not mine) OOOOOOO!!! I think I have an idea... Stay tuned! 

I Can Be A Little Judgmental

But that's okay. It's part of who I am.

Really, it's a facet of my personality type. I will have official, OFFICIAL results on my Myers Briggs personality assessment next week, but I have taken the test on less authentic platforms and had the same result each and every time.

I am what is referred to as an INFJ - Introvert iNtuitive Feeling Judging. According to many resources this combination is the rarest personality type only making up about 1% of the worlds population. See now, don't you feel special knowing me? I do. Ha!

So what does all this mean? My personality type is known as the diplomat.

I like to keep to myself in reality, but that doesn't mean I won't allow a few select people into the fold. I know, seems contradictory; I'm an introvert who doesn't like socializing, but here I sit typing yet another post to the world at large. Think of this as reality TV - for everything you read on here there are dozens of things that got left on the cutting room floor.

As a whole I am a person who is creative, insightful, inspiring, convincing and very opinionated. The four traits mix in such an interesting way with my combo. I can be indecisive at time, and in the next breath I will make snap judgments based on my instincts.

Though I am quiet in nature, I am equally outspoken when defending my ideals and people. My people are my friends and loved ones. Keep that in mind if I ever argue your case about anything. It means more than you know.

On the flip side, especially given the life experiences I have tucked away in my hat, I have a tendency to make judgments based on any patterns I see in another person's behavior. In my heart, I always want to believe I am wrong but my mind will put up walls and prepare me for the worst case scenario. There are always patterns.

Always.

I'm sorry, I'm losing interest in this topic...

Short attention span has nothing to do with my personality type.

Ooo, shiny.

By the way, I have a hilarious little gem of a blog I think I will become a devoted reader to:
https://tammyinpdx.wordpress.com/author/tammyk999/ 
(comment below if the link doesn't load)

The author is a co-worker of mine in the "9-5" world and I love the way she expresses herself in her blog!

Good night, world.

I Got Blisters On Me Fingers

Sunday I was adamant that I had to get our master bedroom painted... Had. To.

I started at 6 or 6:30 and sometime around 7 I was saved by a god only known as my husband. He came in and helped me bust through the first coat. We then took a break so I could finally eat dinner (teryaki salmon with broccoli and barley). We then annihilated the second coat finishing right after 10pm... Of course our amazing offspring slept through all this. We didn't climb into bed until close to midnight.

My hands were so sore and on the verge of blisters... Our room was the largest area we had decided to paint. At least I can say it's done now. I will post some before and after pics later on.

Right now I am taking a break from, you guessed it, painting. I am working on painting the smallest room in the house; the powder room on the first floor. I figured a quick post while coat number one dries was in order.

Overall, Mother's Day was awesome. Collin is a smart man, and many could learn from him. Since the main thing I requested was something best left to me to pick out he took me shopping! I finally, after almost ten years of the same old ones, got brand spanking new pots and pans. They are glorious and I am going to care for them like I would infants - carefully and gently washing them and loving them every minute I am with them. Haha! They are pretty enough I want to get a hanging pot rack for them.

We also splurged on a Keurig K45 (I'd heard too many bad things about the 2.0 to want to try that one just yet). Three days into use and I am wondering how I survived without it before (as a dear friend had mentioned I would). It is just a lovely little invention, and as I said it is a splurge, a complete indulgence. It is a matter of convenience in an otherwise semi-hectic (at times) life.

I also was treated to two new tops and a new dress. The best part about all of it? Thanks to the magic of Kohl's I saved more than I spent. After my coupons and discounts I spent less than the pots and pans and the Keurig combined on sale. Plus there is a $20 mail in rebate on the pans and I got $50 in Kohls cash to use this weekend!

The only negative incident in the whole day (other than the attempt to kill myself via painting), was that two dear friends suffered a horrendous slight that left me full of anger, no, make that rage, sadness and just horrible negative feelings.

Before I get too deep into this, I want to acknowledge that I have requested and received permission to discuss this situation and my reaction to it from the people directly effected. It was a big part of my fuel while I painted.

These friends recently lost a child that was still in utero. It was late term. I will never forget how deeply my heart ached and shattered when I heard the news of their loss. I sat in my cubicle at work with tears streaming down my face trying to figure out why this had to happen to my amazing and beautiful friends. I don't want to go into details but their daughter had other treatable medical conditions that were identified at the gender scan.

Now you have the background.

One of them posted a meme about creationism and how archaeologists found a 25,000 year old object and so on. He is an Atheist. Being myself of an "outside the norm" religious affiliation (as in not part of organized religion) I completely saw the humor in this post. I was then appalled to find that something (I can't even bring myself to refer to it as a human) had commented on how it didn't understand how he could say this when it hadn't been long since he posted how his little angel was in Heaven and so on. I saw red and was instantly enraged. How dare this thing even consider saying such a wretched thing and on Mother's Day to boot. What kind of creature who calls themselves Christian could even begin to think such hurtful and cold-hearted things? What right did it have to even mention their daughter?

I believe that Christianity is a faith of love and goodwill, as most all "religions" are. But then there's this: If you need a book to tell you right from wrong and to be good to your fellow humans then you are already lost. That shit should be in your heart whether Atheist, Christian, Muslim, Jewish, Pagan, Cthuluian, or Flying Spaghetti Monster. That said this isn't a knock against any religion just the people who use it as a shield to "protect" them when they do harmful things.

The rage soared when I found out how this thing knew my friend. This thing was the woman who birthed him. His own flesh and blood. His mother. His twisted, dark, confused, extremely "Christian" mother. I... I just... I just can't even imagine how fucked up a person would have to be to say such a horrible thing on such a public forum to their child who is grieving for the loss of their unborn daughter. I.... My heart hurts for them for having to suffer this indignation. And, believe it or not, my heart hurts for that confused, lonely creature who cannot allow any happiness in the world.

I have a rocky relationship with my mother at best. Mostly because our lives and our life paths are so vastly different it is hard to relate to her. That combined with frequently childish or child like behavior makes it difficult for me to be around her. But even with all that I could never imagine her to say something with such malice and cruelty. I am thankful for this.

I don't know what else can be said. I love my friends, that is one of the treasures of having me call you a friend. I give my all into each friendship I have; this is also the reason I have a small group of close friends. Being an introvert, socializing can be exceptionally draining for me.

With my friendship you also get an increasingly strong "mother bear" attitude. I will go to bat for you. I will fight for you. And above all, I will be there for you when you need me.

I don't need an organized religion for any of that.

Now to apply the second coat, then proof read and post this.

~*~*~*~*~

Painting done, dishes done, in clean clothes, and now to veg out on anime.

I think my next post will be about the before and afters of the two most recently painted rooms in the house and about the Myers Briggs Test.

You Are More Than You Know

I feel like I am cheating you with this, but at the same time I really want to get this out quickly so I can watch Game of Thrones (I know it airs Monday; we watch it the day after).

Finally, my review of the Alton Brown Protein Bar Recipe (<  this is a link to it).

I must say, these are delicious and very filling. They are full of healthy protein and fiber sources along with a nice helping of dried fruit to add some sweetness.

At first, when dividing them up, I thought they would be on the small side. I was pleasantly surprised when I had one.

I made them for the second time this weekend and the only thing I changed was replacing the flour with coconut flour. I don't think it made a bit of difference, except by adding the slightest hint of coconut. My biggest tip is to use gloved hands to spread the batter/dough out evenly. I always have nitrile gloves on hand for various uses.

This weekend was a busy one. Well at least Saturday was. First thing in the morning we had the honor of watching one of the future nurses of the world graduate and receive her pin. From there we had just enough time to run home and grab a quick bite before it was off to the salon for our hair appointments.

The little handled all this activity like a trooper taking naps as we went from one place to the next half the time.

While at the salon, she did one of those amazing things; the kind that just blows you away as a parent. Collin was almost done getting his hair trimmed and I was under the dryer with the solvent in my hair to strip all the color. The little angel had been sitting on my lap but was getting restless and was done with that. So after I failed to convince her to stay on my lap she went and grabbed a hair magazine and sat on the couch. She did this for about five minutes... Which in toddler world is an eternity... I was impressed, baffled and amazed.

 On the way home, literally less than a quarter of a mile from the house, she woke up screaming from a bad dream. Nothing we did at first could console her. So I did what any mother would do; I grabbed her giant stuffed kangaroo, a blanket and sat on the floor with her balled up in my lap rubbing her back and saying soothing things. This is actually one of those rare moments where I was able to get a picture with her.

She eventually calmed down and I was able to snap an after photo for a side by side of pre- and post-hair appointment. 

A MAJOR change from my normal. Blonde on top and dark red brown (almost a purpley color) underneath. I love it. Collin loves it. Even the little wasn't phased by it so I take that as acceptance and love from her. Hahaha!

Another major thing to come from the hair appointment was my commitment to completing a 5k at the end of June. It's for a sad yet amazing cause, which I figure you can read about on your own by clicking the link that follows. The race is the inaugural Love Rocks Run and it happens to fall in eight weeks which coincides with my next hair appointment. The plan is to run the 5k, get my grub on (nothing crazy as it is only a 5k) and then get beautified by my wonderful hair stylist. 

That said, I thought I would check out the Couch 2 5k app from the Google Play store. The goal of the app is to take a person from couch to jogging/running a complete 5k (3.2 miles) in, wouldn't you know it, eight weeks. Well hot diggity damn if that ain't perfect, right? 

Last night I completed Week 1 Day 1 (it's broken into three times per week). I amazed myself, which is getting harder and harder to do. Day one I thought said 30 seconds running and then 90 seconds walking.... Nope. First command after the warm up whispered in my ear, "Run for one minute." The shock of it almost tripped me. I can't run/jog for a full minute... That's crazy.

But here's the thing. I did it. I was cautious and careful for the sake of recent injuries, but I did it. And after that first one, I did it SEVEN more times. Only once did I cut it short and even then it was only by 10-15 seconds. Holy fucking hell. Excuse the language, but wow. I never would have thought to even TRY to run for a minute straight. Even before all this when we did our half marathon we only ever got up to about 30 seconds of jogging... 

You know what this told me? I will do it. I can do it. I am going to own this and make it mine. 

In honor of today, I must quote the wise Yoda, "Do or do not, there is no try."

May the Fourth be with you.

You are more than you can ever imagine. 

I'll keep you posted on my progress with C25K, and everything else this crazy life throws my way.