As the final minutes of yet another year slip through the fingertips of humanity I find myself pondering these past 365 days. I think of that song, you know, the one from RENT.
Ultimately, I got what I wanted from 2015. Even with the hiccups and the blurred weeks of the last however many weeks it's been since I last posted. Obviously I am rusty as my fingers stumble liked tired fools over the keys of my now unfamiliar laptop.
Details are unnecessary as the events themselves are now being archived and filed away for future reference. I found myself lazy and detached while dealing with some medical issue (my eye), family drama and furthering my career development via leadership training.
Unlike years gone by this final post of the year will focus more on the future and not so much the past. I will say this much, as mentioned above, I got exactly what I wanted:
No drastic changes.
We did not change residences. We did not change jobs. We did not change cars. We did not change. That in and of itself may be as big of a curse as it was a blessing.
The best part of all this no change stuff? We were able to grow. Contradictory, I know, but it is true. Without the turmoil I associate with change we were able to focus on ourselves and our family.We were able to focus on our future and really take time to think about what we want to see in that future. So, more than anything, this last year of stability and tedium was a chance to breathe and focus and clear our minds.
I am ready for this new year. Bring it on, 2016! I expect you to be full of changes and shifts and adjustments and everything. I am as rested as I will ever be and ready. I have a toddler so my patience has been fine tuned in the last couple months.
What do we have planned for this year? You will have to wait and see. I promise not to disappoint.
The first change will be to this page. I think it's time for another face lift.
Sleep well whenever it is you decide to call it a night. Know that tomorrow is a whole new day. Seize it. Own it. Make it count.
Happy New Years, mother fuckers!
Thursday, December 31, 2015
Wednesday, October 7, 2015
Leadership Takes A Lot of Creativity
Seriously.
I have bi-weekly classes for my leadership academy. I am thankful they are not more frequent solely because of the amount of creativity required to be awesome.
October... Can you believe it? Freaking October already. Hell, we are a whole week in as of today. I still need to put together our costumes for Halloween. At least I know what we are doing for the costumes and I even have all the supplies. I also know what I am doing for Collin's birthday cake. Always a key event in October.
Three years ago today Collin and I were in Omaha meeting his little sister, her (now) fiance and their adorable son. It's mind boggling how it seems like it has been so much longer than three years, but feels like it wasn't that long ago. Time has begun to flow in strange currents.
Next summer we will be making the road trip out again, but this time we will have our tiny human in tow. I can't wait.
Two nights before we reached Nebraska eastern Wyoming and western Nebraska had just experienced their first snow of the season. Crazy to think of as an Oregonian, especially when this fall has been so mild and gorgeous. When we reached that part of the state it was in the mid-twenties and snow covered the landscape. It was breath taking.
The next morning dawned a frigid 17 degrees in Cheyenne, but nonetheless we made our way through Cheyenne and on towards Omaha.This was an amazing trip for so many reasons, but the main reason was Collin meeting his little sister, who until five years ago we had no idea even existed.
After breakfast it was only an hour or so to the state line.
I think that first night in Omaha will always be a strong memory for us. I wish the miles between us were seconds instead of hours. After next year's visit I think we are going to try and make it out there every other year if not more often.
Family is a precious gift.
Why it took me until my late twenties to fully understand that, I will never know. I try a little harder now to be wherever there is now. I try to be present. I'm sure becoming a mom had something to do with it.
Now I am going to space out and watch some anime.
Maybe next time I will post about our newest trial. Or I'll forget and post something totally off the wall.
We'll see...
I have bi-weekly classes for my leadership academy. I am thankful they are not more frequent solely because of the amount of creativity required to be awesome.
October... Can you believe it? Freaking October already. Hell, we are a whole week in as of today. I still need to put together our costumes for Halloween. At least I know what we are doing for the costumes and I even have all the supplies. I also know what I am doing for Collin's birthday cake. Always a key event in October.
Three years ago today Collin and I were in Omaha meeting his little sister, her (now) fiance and their adorable son. It's mind boggling how it seems like it has been so much longer than three years, but feels like it wasn't that long ago. Time has begun to flow in strange currents.
Next summer we will be making the road trip out again, but this time we will have our tiny human in tow. I can't wait.
Two nights before we reached Nebraska eastern Wyoming and western Nebraska had just experienced their first snow of the season. Crazy to think of as an Oregonian, especially when this fall has been so mild and gorgeous. When we reached that part of the state it was in the mid-twenties and snow covered the landscape. It was breath taking.
The next morning dawned a frigid 17 degrees in Cheyenne, but nonetheless we made our way through Cheyenne and on towards Omaha.This was an amazing trip for so many reasons, but the main reason was Collin meeting his little sister, who until five years ago we had no idea even existed.
After breakfast it was only an hour or so to the state line.
I think that first night in Omaha will always be a strong memory for us. I wish the miles between us were seconds instead of hours. After next year's visit I think we are going to try and make it out there every other year if not more often.
Family is a precious gift.
Why it took me until my late twenties to fully understand that, I will never know. I try a little harder now to be wherever there is now. I try to be present. I'm sure becoming a mom had something to do with it.
Now I am going to space out and watch some anime.
Maybe next time I will post about our newest trial. Or I'll forget and post something totally off the wall.
We'll see...
Saturday, September 26, 2015
...And The Dead Will Rise
I am exhausted. So much so that I just spelled exhausted the first time I typed it and it took a second for me to figure out what was wrong with it. I came upstairs with the intent to turn in early and try to recover some of the lost hours of sleep. Getting up for school on a Saturday is a sick joke, but we'll get there. After all, until the beginning of this month I was doing that to go to the gym.
Here I lounge with my laptop warming my legs beneath my comforter. I finally found the pattern breaks in my duvet cover and now they are glaringly obvious to me. It bothers me immensely and I want to get a new duvet cover, but I will live for now.
I'm wearing Collin's Portland Winter Hawks thermal. I think at this point it is mine since I am the one that wears it all the time. Only around the house though. I won't wear it in public. I don't want to give anyone the wrong idea and lead them to believe I am a *gasp* Chicago fan. Blah! Bleck! NEVER! Detroit, baby!
I can't get the brightness on my screen to adjust... This light is kind of killing me. The thoughts though, there are so many thoughts and memories and experiences floating around that I am trying to save that I haven't been able to share with you. After today I know now that I need to free up the space on my hard drive, so come hell or high water I need to find the time to spew out this rubbish. More for me than anything, but I still hope you all find some solace and humor in it all.
We'll rewind a bit, but I am only going over the high level crap. If I feel like going into more detail I will write another post about that specific thing. The only thing I might really get into tonight is why I haven't been on here (it ties into why my laptop's lack of brightness adjustment is pissing me off).
Our tenth wedding anniversary was last month. Collin had it planned for the last three year, no joke, since before the wee one was even on the horizon. It was a wonderful weekend. Day one was coffee and shopping with my best friend and lunch. Then Collin and I went downtown for some black light miniature golf (this was an unknown to me so I was wearing heels and a dress which was WAY out of the box for me), followed by happy hour and then dinner. Between the main course and dessert Collin got down on one knee in the middle of the restaurant and asked me to marry him again. Got me all misty eyed. Day two was tattoos with the unfortunate mix of the little monster going exorcist mode so we had to get her from daycare early but timing it all worked out. I got tatted first while he picked the bugger up and then we switched off. The new tattoo is epicly nerdy and translates to the following:
I <3 nbsp="" p="" u="">(I love you more)
The pic is first day after so it was still swollen; it's around my wrist like a cuff bracelet.
Day three was hair and nails. I got the undercut I have been dreaming off and we threw some purple into the blond. One last purple hurrah before I bid it adieu for a while. Too many people have it, and too much of my clothing "matches." Day four was meant to be a trip to the county fair but with all the smoke from the summer fires in Oregon it just wasn't a good idea to spend the day outside.
As I shared I don't know when, I have been dealing with an uncomfortable and weird eye issue. Well, the last weekend of August I had a horribly bad episode. I was an idiot and forgot to put my ointment in after staying up way too fucking late. The next morning (if you can call three a.m. that) I woke up in agony. My eye was this burning hole of Hades in my face. I couldn't open it without sobbing. Me being the stubborn shit I am thought I could sleep it off. So I stayed in bed. Normally these little episodes would resolve within a few hours. Not this one. I went to urgent care, but given the nature of my case there was naught they could do for me other than put a eye patch style gauze bandage on me and give me a note excusing me from work until my appointment with ophthalmology (I've got really good at spelling that now) on Tuesday. The rest of Sunday was hell. Monday was only mildly better. Tuesday I still didn't want to open my eye, but I did for the ophthalmologist. What killed me was them asking me to do a vision test.... I could barely stand to open my damn eye let alone try and use it.
Standard procedure I know. Anyways, my super doctor took one look at me eye and saw that I was in deep trouble. I had come terrifyingly close to completely detaching the first layer of my cornea this time. She had to numb my eye and do some "clean up" around the edges to help my cornea try and reattach and then she put a contact lens bandage in place. I got some new eye drops and a note saying no worky until I spoke to the corneal specialist the next day.
This was for the best since once the numbing wore off my eye was throbbing. Can you imagine that sensation? Your eye throbbing. Not like headache style, I mean like new tattoo/deep flesh wound throbbing. You know the sensation I mean, right? Yea, imagine that in your goddamn eye. I spent the majority of the day in bed. The next morning I felt a little better. I mean I could open my goddamn eye without screaming so that was good.
I saw the corneal specialist and he noted that it had begun to heal and he didn't want to remove the bandage but he wanted to see me back at the end of the month with a lens change in between. He also released me for work.
This past week has been the first week I have not needed to see my eye care team. The week after all this I needed to get my contact changed due to protein build up; it felt like there was a hair stuck in my eye. Last week my contact was pinching, but the corneal dude didn't want to take it off because the whole point of it is to keep the lens in place and keep the cornea protected. I go in on Tuesday for my follow up. I am praying that this lens bandage thing is working. I really don't want to have surgery on my eye.
Outside of this wonderful experience, work has been hell. So much change, and I know some of it will bring about amazingly good things, but some of it is down right crushing. Thank god for my home life. As I alluded to above, we cancelled our gym memberships in favor of using the fitness center at work as needed. It's not quite as far and well, it's free. We've also cut back on other things in order to start saving up for some big ticket things. Also, we are still recovering from the engine rebuild in Collin's car. It helps to have firm goals in mind though, and a partner sharing the vision. Good way to stay on track. So we nixed the gym in favor of family walks in the evenings after work. The princess loves them. More and more she is wanting out of her strolled to walk and explore. We are encouraging as we want her to continue to this independent path.
We have also been getting back to some very, very light gaming. By light I mean Minecraft a couple nights a week. I think we are going to check out Skyforge soon.
Oh yea, so the reason I need to clear the cache in my head:
I got accepted to my company's leadership program. It's nine wonderful months of spending every other Saturday in a room with my peers from throughout my company learning how to be effective and inspiring leaders. This is in line with my career development plan. Okay, so there's only ten of us including me, but still. Today was the first day and it was quite interesting. We shall see how this goes and what amazing takeaways I get from it.
I'm sure I have a million other things to tell you about, but my goal was to get to bed early and it's now a quarter past ten.
You'll hear from me again soon. I want to go into detail about the anniversary dinner date. It was AMAZING.
Have a safe night! (PS I didn't proof read this, so bite me.)
Here I lounge with my laptop warming my legs beneath my comforter. I finally found the pattern breaks in my duvet cover and now they are glaringly obvious to me. It bothers me immensely and I want to get a new duvet cover, but I will live for now.
I'm wearing Collin's Portland Winter Hawks thermal. I think at this point it is mine since I am the one that wears it all the time. Only around the house though. I won't wear it in public. I don't want to give anyone the wrong idea and lead them to believe I am a *gasp* Chicago fan. Blah! Bleck! NEVER! Detroit, baby!
I can't get the brightness on my screen to adjust... This light is kind of killing me. The thoughts though, there are so many thoughts and memories and experiences floating around that I am trying to save that I haven't been able to share with you. After today I know now that I need to free up the space on my hard drive, so come hell or high water I need to find the time to spew out this rubbish. More for me than anything, but I still hope you all find some solace and humor in it all.
We'll rewind a bit, but I am only going over the high level crap. If I feel like going into more detail I will write another post about that specific thing. The only thing I might really get into tonight is why I haven't been on here (it ties into why my laptop's lack of brightness adjustment is pissing me off).
Our tenth wedding anniversary was last month. Collin had it planned for the last three year, no joke, since before the wee one was even on the horizon. It was a wonderful weekend. Day one was coffee and shopping with my best friend and lunch. Then Collin and I went downtown for some black light miniature golf (this was an unknown to me so I was wearing heels and a dress which was WAY out of the box for me), followed by happy hour and then dinner. Between the main course and dessert Collin got down on one knee in the middle of the restaurant and asked me to marry him again. Got me all misty eyed. Day two was tattoos with the unfortunate mix of the little monster going exorcist mode so we had to get her from daycare early but timing it all worked out. I got tatted first while he picked the bugger up and then we switched off. The new tattoo is epicly nerdy and translates to the following:
I <3 nbsp="" p="" u="">(I love you more)
The pic is first day after so it was still swollen; it's around my wrist like a cuff bracelet.
Day three was hair and nails. I got the undercut I have been dreaming off and we threw some purple into the blond. One last purple hurrah before I bid it adieu for a while. Too many people have it, and too much of my clothing "matches." Day four was meant to be a trip to the county fair but with all the smoke from the summer fires in Oregon it just wasn't a good idea to spend the day outside.
As I shared I don't know when, I have been dealing with an uncomfortable and weird eye issue. Well, the last weekend of August I had a horribly bad episode. I was an idiot and forgot to put my ointment in after staying up way too fucking late. The next morning (if you can call three a.m. that) I woke up in agony. My eye was this burning hole of Hades in my face. I couldn't open it without sobbing. Me being the stubborn shit I am thought I could sleep it off. So I stayed in bed. Normally these little episodes would resolve within a few hours. Not this one. I went to urgent care, but given the nature of my case there was naught they could do for me other than put a eye patch style gauze bandage on me and give me a note excusing me from work until my appointment with ophthalmology (I've got really good at spelling that now) on Tuesday. The rest of Sunday was hell. Monday was only mildly better. Tuesday I still didn't want to open my eye, but I did for the ophthalmologist. What killed me was them asking me to do a vision test.... I could barely stand to open my damn eye let alone try and use it.
Standard procedure I know. Anyways, my super doctor took one look at me eye and saw that I was in deep trouble. I had come terrifyingly close to completely detaching the first layer of my cornea this time. She had to numb my eye and do some "clean up" around the edges to help my cornea try and reattach and then she put a contact lens bandage in place. I got some new eye drops and a note saying no worky until I spoke to the corneal specialist the next day.
This was for the best since once the numbing wore off my eye was throbbing. Can you imagine that sensation? Your eye throbbing. Not like headache style, I mean like new tattoo/deep flesh wound throbbing. You know the sensation I mean, right? Yea, imagine that in your goddamn eye. I spent the majority of the day in bed. The next morning I felt a little better. I mean I could open my goddamn eye without screaming so that was good.
I saw the corneal specialist and he noted that it had begun to heal and he didn't want to remove the bandage but he wanted to see me back at the end of the month with a lens change in between. He also released me for work.
This past week has been the first week I have not needed to see my eye care team. The week after all this I needed to get my contact changed due to protein build up; it felt like there was a hair stuck in my eye. Last week my contact was pinching, but the corneal dude didn't want to take it off because the whole point of it is to keep the lens in place and keep the cornea protected. I go in on Tuesday for my follow up. I am praying that this lens bandage thing is working. I really don't want to have surgery on my eye.
Outside of this wonderful experience, work has been hell. So much change, and I know some of it will bring about amazingly good things, but some of it is down right crushing. Thank god for my home life. As I alluded to above, we cancelled our gym memberships in favor of using the fitness center at work as needed. It's not quite as far and well, it's free. We've also cut back on other things in order to start saving up for some big ticket things. Also, we are still recovering from the engine rebuild in Collin's car. It helps to have firm goals in mind though, and a partner sharing the vision. Good way to stay on track. So we nixed the gym in favor of family walks in the evenings after work. The princess loves them. More and more she is wanting out of her strolled to walk and explore. We are encouraging as we want her to continue to this independent path.
We have also been getting back to some very, very light gaming. By light I mean Minecraft a couple nights a week. I think we are going to check out Skyforge soon.
Oh yea, so the reason I need to clear the cache in my head:
I got accepted to my company's leadership program. It's nine wonderful months of spending every other Saturday in a room with my peers from throughout my company learning how to be effective and inspiring leaders. This is in line with my career development plan. Okay, so there's only ten of us including me, but still. Today was the first day and it was quite interesting. We shall see how this goes and what amazing takeaways I get from it.
I'm sure I have a million other things to tell you about, but my goal was to get to bed early and it's now a quarter past ten.
You'll hear from me again soon. I want to go into detail about the anniversary dinner date. It was AMAZING.
Have a safe night! (PS I didn't proof read this, so bite me.)
Wednesday, August 12, 2015
When Did That Become Optional?
I'm looking forward tomorrow with a mix of motivation and trepidation. It'll be day two of fasting for this week. I am motivated because Monday really wasn't that bad and it was a challenge that I was able to beat. I am anxious because... I don't know. I really have no valid reason to be nervous.
I guess this is proof of our innate ability to be our own worst enemy. I know I can survive and feel good through tomorrow's fasting, so why be nervous?
Just typing that little bit was very therapeutic for me.
Here's my rant for the week. Okay, maybe just today. And, it really isn't a rant, more of an observation of great annoyance.
In the two hundred to three hundred miles of driving I do in an average week to and from work, the gym, the store, and outings on the weekend I am noticing more and more people who don't seem to have turn signals on their cars. I mean, I'm sure if they had them they'd use them, right? Right?!
Just a gentle reminder to the world at large:
I guess this is proof of our innate ability to be our own worst enemy. I know I can survive and feel good through tomorrow's fasting, so why be nervous?
Just typing that little bit was very therapeutic for me.
Here's my rant for the week. Okay, maybe just today. And, it really isn't a rant, more of an observation of great annoyance.
In the two hundred to three hundred miles of driving I do in an average week to and from work, the gym, the store, and outings on the weekend I am noticing more and more people who don't seem to have turn signals on their cars. I mean, I'm sure if they had them they'd use them, right? Right?!
Just a gentle reminder to the world at large:
It is not rocket science.
You want to turn a direction other than the one in which the road you are on is traveling? You effing indicate!
Changing lanes? Pretty much a fantastic idea for you to signal.
You are turning left in the left turn only lane, YOU STILL USE YOUR SIGNAL!
You're turning out of a parking lot? YOU STILL NEED TO INDICATE!
This is a pretty basic rule of the driving world... It is so strongly ingrained in me that I apologize to whomever is listening (even if I am alone in the car) if I forget to signal. Hell, I even signal when it is unnecessary some times. Mainly, if I am going around a 90° corner (common in the surrounding farm areas).
You may be wondering why it is such a reflex for me, well, when I was younger I was pulled over for failure to signal... The cop didn't care that I turned off without signaling because I was a little shaken by the ass hat that almost side swiped me.... Neither here nor there.
Friday I will give you the highlights of tomorrow's fasting and how it feels after my workout (tomorrow is my gym night, Monday was Collin's).
Now to play some Need for Speed (much cheaper than a ticket).
Monday, August 10, 2015
This Will Either Be a Glorious Experience or a Horrific Experiment
As I have shared for a few months now, I have been stuck on the scale. Seeing only the slightest improvements by eating regularly (I think I discussed how we had virtually stopped eating at work and then would over eat in the evenings; if I didn't well there's the cliff notes version of it).
I physically feel myself becoming slimmer and have eye witness commentary (because they are always reliable), but the scale's mind is slow to change. A pound this month, a few ounces here, nothing as substantial as the effort I feel I am putting in. Which is a recipe for a disastrous back slide.
I have a co-worker who has been steadily slimming down. She is already slender but with her petite frame and being towards middle age noticed she was developing a bit of a tummy. She is big into natural and organics and energy and so on. She started doing intermittent fasting; commonly this is called the 5:2 diet, but as you know, I LOATHE the word diet. I am going to refer to it as the 5:2 method or IF (intermittent fasting) method.
She has been singing its praise for months. I kind of shrugged it off the way I do when people start going on about what sounds like a fad diet. Then another gal in the office decided she wants to try it so lady A brought the book for this methodology in for lady B. Since it was floating around I asked if I could borrow the book. I wanted to give this thing a read.
I did. I read the whole thing in less than a week. I may be gullible, but I am sold. The science behind the method is fairly sound (though I can guarantee there is something out there that will argue against it) and the various trials really peeked my interest. Further more the lab results on participants blood work and the improvements on their body compositions is astounding.
Being a nerd, the biological and chemical side of this whole practice has me bouncing off the walls.
I am just going to give you the bare bones premise of the methodology and if you find it as interesting as I did you can check out their website and book here: The Fast Diet.
The idea is that for five of the seven days of the week, you eat a normal, balanced diet; with the occasional treats and so on. The remaining two days of the week you only consume 25% of your "feed" day calories. So, as a woman you'd eat around 2,000 calories a day, five days a week and then only consume ~500 calories two days a week. Everyone's opinion on the when to consume the calories is different, but the common thread is to basically fast. If you need a definition of what it is to fast check out the wiki page here: Fasting.
Many religions fast in one form or another for various reasons. Again, for the in depth check out the site and so on. The main difference I find with this compared to all the various fad diet babble I have heard is that it is completely flexible and sustainable.
All this I could go on and on about, but it's not for me to convince any one else to try this crazy thing. It's for you. As I experience this super fun method I will share my results and notes. That is one thing they strongly suggest is taking little notes, ESPECIALLY on the fasting days. That is just what I did, today, my first official fasting day. I wasn't sure how I was going to approach this; I was prepared to need to have a light snack (granny smith apple) if I absolutely needed it. But I didn't and it felt GREAT.
The following are the notes I jotted down throughout the day:
9:30A - I feel hungry and "shaky" but I think it's a mental thing. More water and tea.
10:15A - Feel surprisingly focused and alert. No hunger pangs. Just made some herbal tea (passion and orange) to cool and pour over ice once black tea is gone.
11:45A - Lunch hour is upon us and I feel a little intimidated. Looking forward to our walk in 30 minutes.
12:47P - Lunch walk = great. C struggling with the hungries. Asked if he was writing anything down when it was overpowering, he said no. Wished he'd known how it helped earlier. He had an apple. Told him that's fine. He gets 100 calories more a day than me anyways. Zen tea brewed and cooling.
1:15P - Realize going to Pinterest is/would be a bad idea on FD (fast day). Luckily before going to it!
Small victory
2:05P - Struggling, not sure with what. Just feeling my mind screaming for all sorts. Not emotional... I think. I can make it. 3 hours +/- until a delicious dinner. Just need to finish work! IPO here I come.
3:55P - I DID IT!!
Then we came home, bathed the gremlin and had a deliciously wonderful dinner. I made a light soup with the leftover pad thai veggies from last night. Edamame, broccoli, zucchini, red bell peppers and tofu in chicken broth (seasoned by the leftover sauce from last night and some ginger). It was soooo good.
Now the real struggle: to make it to bed without snacking. I can do this...
Our plan is to fast Mondays and Thursdays (they also are the most common days). Once we reach our goals we will switch to a 6:1 method. Obviously, when we get preggo this will be 100% on hold. It is not healthy to repeatedly fast while trying to grow a human.
As I start to see results (or lack there of) I will be sure to share with you. I will also share my notes as we go from most of the fast days unless it's super boring such as repeatedly writing pickle... Ha!
I will not be giving up my Thursday gym night, plenty of people fast and are still active. We each have one gym night affected by the fasting so it is balanced. We'll see how this goes.
As always, you are welcome to leave your thoughts below. Am I crazy? Have you ever tried something similar? What ever you want.
Now for some tea and anime. *smiles*
I physically feel myself becoming slimmer and have eye witness commentary (because they are always reliable), but the scale's mind is slow to change. A pound this month, a few ounces here, nothing as substantial as the effort I feel I am putting in. Which is a recipe for a disastrous back slide.
I have a co-worker who has been steadily slimming down. She is already slender but with her petite frame and being towards middle age noticed she was developing a bit of a tummy. She is big into natural and organics and energy and so on. She started doing intermittent fasting; commonly this is called the 5:2 diet, but as you know, I LOATHE the word diet. I am going to refer to it as the 5:2 method or IF (intermittent fasting) method.
She has been singing its praise for months. I kind of shrugged it off the way I do when people start going on about what sounds like a fad diet. Then another gal in the office decided she wants to try it so lady A brought the book for this methodology in for lady B. Since it was floating around I asked if I could borrow the book. I wanted to give this thing a read.
I did. I read the whole thing in less than a week. I may be gullible, but I am sold. The science behind the method is fairly sound (though I can guarantee there is something out there that will argue against it) and the various trials really peeked my interest. Further more the lab results on participants blood work and the improvements on their body compositions is astounding.
Being a nerd, the biological and chemical side of this whole practice has me bouncing off the walls.
I am just going to give you the bare bones premise of the methodology and if you find it as interesting as I did you can check out their website and book here: The Fast Diet.
The idea is that for five of the seven days of the week, you eat a normal, balanced diet; with the occasional treats and so on. The remaining two days of the week you only consume 25% of your "feed" day calories. So, as a woman you'd eat around 2,000 calories a day, five days a week and then only consume ~500 calories two days a week. Everyone's opinion on the when to consume the calories is different, but the common thread is to basically fast. If you need a definition of what it is to fast check out the wiki page here: Fasting.
Many religions fast in one form or another for various reasons. Again, for the in depth check out the site and so on. The main difference I find with this compared to all the various fad diet babble I have heard is that it is completely flexible and sustainable.
All this I could go on and on about, but it's not for me to convince any one else to try this crazy thing. It's for you. As I experience this super fun method I will share my results and notes. That is one thing they strongly suggest is taking little notes, ESPECIALLY on the fasting days. That is just what I did, today, my first official fasting day. I wasn't sure how I was going to approach this; I was prepared to need to have a light snack (granny smith apple) if I absolutely needed it. But I didn't and it felt GREAT.
The following are the notes I jotted down throughout the day:
9:30A - I feel hungry and "shaky" but I think it's a mental thing. More water and tea.
10:15A - Feel surprisingly focused and alert. No hunger pangs. Just made some herbal tea (passion and orange) to cool and pour over ice once black tea is gone.
11:45A - Lunch hour is upon us and I feel a little intimidated. Looking forward to our walk in 30 minutes.
12:47P - Lunch walk = great. C struggling with the hungries. Asked if he was writing anything down when it was overpowering, he said no. Wished he'd known how it helped earlier. He had an apple. Told him that's fine. He gets 100 calories more a day than me anyways. Zen tea brewed and cooling.
1:15P - Realize going to Pinterest is/would be a bad idea on FD (fast day). Luckily before going to it!
Small victory
2:05P - Struggling, not sure with what. Just feeling my mind screaming for all sorts. Not emotional... I think. I can make it. 3 hours +/- until a delicious dinner. Just need to finish work! IPO here I come.
3:55P - I DID IT!!
Then we came home, bathed the gremlin and had a deliciously wonderful dinner. I made a light soup with the leftover pad thai veggies from last night. Edamame, broccoli, zucchini, red bell peppers and tofu in chicken broth (seasoned by the leftover sauce from last night and some ginger). It was soooo good.
Now the real struggle: to make it to bed without snacking. I can do this...
Our plan is to fast Mondays and Thursdays (they also are the most common days). Once we reach our goals we will switch to a 6:1 method. Obviously, when we get preggo this will be 100% on hold. It is not healthy to repeatedly fast while trying to grow a human.
As I start to see results (or lack there of) I will be sure to share with you. I will also share my notes as we go from most of the fast days unless it's super boring such as repeatedly writing pickle... Ha!
I will not be giving up my Thursday gym night, plenty of people fast and are still active. We each have one gym night affected by the fasting so it is balanced. We'll see how this goes.
As always, you are welcome to leave your thoughts below. Am I crazy? Have you ever tried something similar? What ever you want.
Now for some tea and anime. *smiles*
Wednesday, August 5, 2015
Why Have I Waited So Long
It just dawned on me that it has only been in the last year or so that I have been fully open with people about how Collin and I met. I don't know why; I really can't think of a valid reason. There's multiple invalid reasons that mainly revolve around other people's opinions and at this point those really have no bearing... They never really did, I guess.
Our meeting was unconventional at the time and in many ways still is. The summer we met was a weird one for me with a lot of change and growth and turmoil and drama (for lack of a better word). It was dramatic for Collin too but that is not my story to tell. He started the summer dating someone that was not me, but that ended in the weeks prior to our story's inception.
The summer of 2004 I pushed away a person I thought was a best friend and was trying to help a loved one at the same time; one situation was the catalyst for the other, but I am past the point of blaming, bitching and complaining. If not for the extreme events that summer I can't say we would have met when we did. I have no doubt we would have met regardless, but the when may have changed.
It was mid-August, I was looking for someone. I was nineteen and felt like I had to find someone to be dating. I was an adult. I talked to a couple people and went on a date here and there. All of them I met online. And all of them I killed.... Okay, no, that's not true but it made it sound as creepy as everyone made online dating seem.
One night, I found myself in an Oregon chat room on Yahoo (my rooms of choice) and I was talking with all the other Oregonians about this, that and the other thing. When some dude with the most "creative" screen name started to chat me up. It started with some random comment in response to something one of us said (still not 100% sure if he initiated the private message or me) and little did we know it would blossom into more than a decade of weird and adorable banter between two identically twisted souls.
We spent the next few hours messaging back and forth about everything. We exchanged pictures and the old A/L (we kind of knew the S part from the get go) and eventually started up our web cams. It was completely G rated and in hindsight the webcam thing was kind of funny; we would watch one another type.... Woohoo!
The next day I worked for a few hours and as soon as I got home we met up on messenger and spent some time chatting. After a bit we decided we should talk on the phone. We then spent the next few hours on the phone until he had to leave for work. I'll never forget that night because it was the first time I heard a voice that I can now not imagine a day without. Also, there was a minor earthquake that night and I remember calling him right after it happened (it was minutes after we had hung up). Nothing was damaged and I was not hurt, but I still had that urge to call him.
At the time he was a security officer in Salem and working graveyard shift alone. After he got to work and relieved the previous dude for the night he called and we spent the next four to six hours talking about everything and nothing. Music and cars and our lives and our families. All in all, just that evening and night we spent over ten hours on the phone together. Yea, this was back before unlimited calling... I don't think about what it did to my cell phone bill...
Amidst all this conversing we decided we wanted to meet face to face for realsies. It was terrifying for me since I already felt this intense connection to a person I had never physically met. I worked the next day but he was off that night so he agreed to come to Lincoln City.
He almost didn't make it because his dad took him out for a drink to chat him up about moving on from his last girlfriend (it was pretty serious) and Collin told him that he was coming to meet me. With the faintest of buzzes (ah, we were young and stupid, but he was definitely below the legal limit) he made his way to my apartment. We were going to meet at my work, but he was running late because of the aforementioned beverage.
I was in my room, halfway out the window while I smoked a cigarette (young and stupid, young and stupid....) when I saw him walk through the parking lot to my place... I still swear my heart skipped a beat. We spent the first few moments basking in the reality of one another's presence and then... Yea, I'm not writing a romance novel here. Let's just say we spent the evening "talking" and enjoying each other's "company"...
The next day I had to work. I already knew for me that this was game over. I was lost. I was inexplicably and irrevocably in love with this person I had only known existed for three or four days. What the hell...
Back to the story; I got ready for work, Collin decided to call off for his scheduled shift that night so we could spend more time together and then he offered to take me to work. As we made our way to his car (which was actually his grandma's while his was in the shop) my mother happened to walk by and said, "Hi, Alicia........... Hi, Alicia's friend....." I just waved hi and kept walking.... To his surprise and my own we found the car was gone. I asked where he had parked it and he pointed to an area in front of some other units.... They were really strict about not parking in front of other apartments.... My stomach filled with dread as we walked to the manager's office. Luckily I was friends with the manager. I asked if she knew where the car was and she regrettably told me that it had been towed.... Well shit...
Collin called his parents and let them know what had happened and they said they would come pick up the car the next day, but he needed to get his ass home that night. He called a couple friends and some of them agreed to come down and get him later. He hung out around the mall while I worked and even bought me lunch. Afterwards we walked to the bank so I could make my nightly deposit for the salon and then walked back home. We shared a few more hours together before his friends arrived to take him back to the Tron.
When we parted ways it felt like my heart was being ripped from my chest. Very cliche I know, but it is an accurate description of the physical pain I felt by the absence of his presence. We held on as long as we could and then they had to leave. He promised to call once he got home and we swore we would find a way to get together again soon.
I was exhausted after minimal sleep over the last four days since our first private message. I promptly passed out while waiting for his call.... I never heard the phone ring and was a little saddened when I woke up the next morning. Turns out he had called, but my sister had taken my phone from my room.... Yea... Anyways,
After work that day we were online chatting more and we had the biggest, most impacting conversation of my life at the time (and I'd like to think his as well). I will never forget how sheepish we both were about the whole thing. Our wedding date has more significance than many know, and is just further proof of how cheesy we really are. Anyways, on August 21, 2004, after both of us trying to feel out the other person's intentions, we professed our budding love for one another. It was fast, really fast, which is why I am not one to really talk about the speed of other people's relationships (unless the timeline was shorter than ours, then they're nuts, fucking nuts. Hahaha)
We were married a year later, to the day. In just over two weeks we will be celebrating our tenth wedding anniversary. I can count the number of "fights" we have had on one hand, and I'm sorry but I do not agree with the school of thinking that claims this is unhealthy for a relationship. Even the fights we have had would not be classified as such by others. It's just not how we deal with our issues. We talk about everything. Other than gifts and similar type surprises, we have no secrets. Period. We will keep yours, so don't worry, but please don't expect us to keep them from eachother. If you've told me, he knows; if you told him, I know. Plain and simple.
The only mystery left in our marriage? We don't shit in front of each other. Hell, we rarely even take a piss in front of each other...
So think about this: we openly communicate with each other, we keep zero secrets and we give each other private time when they need to use the bathroom... Also we don't do each other's laundry beyond maybe throwing a missed article in the wash with our own or moving clothes to the dryer. Otherwise he washes his and I wash mine. We share responsibility for household laundry.
I think these points are our "secrets" to a happy marriage, but alas, this is just my opinion and what has worked for us. As gross as this may sound, we still hate to be apart for more than a few hours. We are completely content to do our own thing and we do (such as me typing these thoughts out or him studying nerd stuff), but we enjoy being together even while doing separate things.
Our relationship is heading into its twelfth year; our marriage, its eleventh year and I can't imagine having spent the last decade plus any other way. I can't even begin to fathom the adventures in store for us from here as we grow and our family grows (yes, we hope to try for an addition sometime next year or the following).
To Collin, who I know has read every single word and probably even had his share of flashbacks to the big bang (try not to laugh, I can hear you in my head) that started the universe of our love, I love you more, always and forever. Thank you for being the perfect match for me in every way imaginable. Thank you for putting up with my crazy, my insecurities, and my overactive imagination. I can't imagine a life without you; past, present or future. As creepy as it is sometimes, you are in my head and completely in tune with me. I will never, ever, ever be able to fully express the endless fathoms of my love for you. I can't wait to see what you have up your sleeve for our anniversary (he has been planning this event for over two years).
There it is. It's all laid bare before your eyes. Judge me if you want, but that won't change what I have or what I have built.
If you take anything away from this, I hope it is the belief that soul mates exist (not necessarily in a romantic capacity, but they are there) and that there should be no secrets in a relationship.
Honesty is the cement slab the foundation of your love is placed upon, and without it the house that is your relationship will likely be unstable and destined to crumble.
Our meeting was unconventional at the time and in many ways still is. The summer we met was a weird one for me with a lot of change and growth and turmoil and drama (for lack of a better word). It was dramatic for Collin too but that is not my story to tell. He started the summer dating someone that was not me, but that ended in the weeks prior to our story's inception.
The summer of 2004 I pushed away a person I thought was a best friend and was trying to help a loved one at the same time; one situation was the catalyst for the other, but I am past the point of blaming, bitching and complaining. If not for the extreme events that summer I can't say we would have met when we did. I have no doubt we would have met regardless, but the when may have changed.
It was mid-August, I was looking for someone. I was nineteen and felt like I had to find someone to be dating. I was an adult. I talked to a couple people and went on a date here and there. All of them I met online. And all of them I killed.... Okay, no, that's not true but it made it sound as creepy as everyone made online dating seem.
One night, I found myself in an Oregon chat room on Yahoo (my rooms of choice) and I was talking with all the other Oregonians about this, that and the other thing. When some dude with the most "creative" screen name started to chat me up. It started with some random comment in response to something one of us said (still not 100% sure if he initiated the private message or me) and little did we know it would blossom into more than a decade of weird and adorable banter between two identically twisted souls.
We spent the next few hours messaging back and forth about everything. We exchanged pictures and the old A/L (we kind of knew the S part from the get go) and eventually started up our web cams. It was completely G rated and in hindsight the webcam thing was kind of funny; we would watch one another type.... Woohoo!
The next day I worked for a few hours and as soon as I got home we met up on messenger and spent some time chatting. After a bit we decided we should talk on the phone. We then spent the next few hours on the phone until he had to leave for work. I'll never forget that night because it was the first time I heard a voice that I can now not imagine a day without. Also, there was a minor earthquake that night and I remember calling him right after it happened (it was minutes after we had hung up). Nothing was damaged and I was not hurt, but I still had that urge to call him.
At the time he was a security officer in Salem and working graveyard shift alone. After he got to work and relieved the previous dude for the night he called and we spent the next four to six hours talking about everything and nothing. Music and cars and our lives and our families. All in all, just that evening and night we spent over ten hours on the phone together. Yea, this was back before unlimited calling... I don't think about what it did to my cell phone bill...
Amidst all this conversing we decided we wanted to meet face to face for realsies. It was terrifying for me since I already felt this intense connection to a person I had never physically met. I worked the next day but he was off that night so he agreed to come to Lincoln City.
He almost didn't make it because his dad took him out for a drink to chat him up about moving on from his last girlfriend (it was pretty serious) and Collin told him that he was coming to meet me. With the faintest of buzzes (ah, we were young and stupid, but he was definitely below the legal limit) he made his way to my apartment. We were going to meet at my work, but he was running late because of the aforementioned beverage.
I was in my room, halfway out the window while I smoked a cigarette (young and stupid, young and stupid....) when I saw him walk through the parking lot to my place... I still swear my heart skipped a beat. We spent the first few moments basking in the reality of one another's presence and then... Yea, I'm not writing a romance novel here. Let's just say we spent the evening "talking" and enjoying each other's "company"...
The next day I had to work. I already knew for me that this was game over. I was lost. I was inexplicably and irrevocably in love with this person I had only known existed for three or four days. What the hell...
Back to the story; I got ready for work, Collin decided to call off for his scheduled shift that night so we could spend more time together and then he offered to take me to work. As we made our way to his car (which was actually his grandma's while his was in the shop) my mother happened to walk by and said, "Hi, Alicia........... Hi, Alicia's friend....." I just waved hi and kept walking.... To his surprise and my own we found the car was gone. I asked where he had parked it and he pointed to an area in front of some other units.... They were really strict about not parking in front of other apartments.... My stomach filled with dread as we walked to the manager's office. Luckily I was friends with the manager. I asked if she knew where the car was and she regrettably told me that it had been towed.... Well shit...
Collin called his parents and let them know what had happened and they said they would come pick up the car the next day, but he needed to get his ass home that night. He called a couple friends and some of them agreed to come down and get him later. He hung out around the mall while I worked and even bought me lunch. Afterwards we walked to the bank so I could make my nightly deposit for the salon and then walked back home. We shared a few more hours together before his friends arrived to take him back to the Tron.
When we parted ways it felt like my heart was being ripped from my chest. Very cliche I know, but it is an accurate description of the physical pain I felt by the absence of his presence. We held on as long as we could and then they had to leave. He promised to call once he got home and we swore we would find a way to get together again soon.
I was exhausted after minimal sleep over the last four days since our first private message. I promptly passed out while waiting for his call.... I never heard the phone ring and was a little saddened when I woke up the next morning. Turns out he had called, but my sister had taken my phone from my room.... Yea... Anyways,
After work that day we were online chatting more and we had the biggest, most impacting conversation of my life at the time (and I'd like to think his as well). I will never forget how sheepish we both were about the whole thing. Our wedding date has more significance than many know, and is just further proof of how cheesy we really are. Anyways, on August 21, 2004, after both of us trying to feel out the other person's intentions, we professed our budding love for one another. It was fast, really fast, which is why I am not one to really talk about the speed of other people's relationships (unless the timeline was shorter than ours, then they're nuts, fucking nuts. Hahaha)
We were married a year later, to the day. In just over two weeks we will be celebrating our tenth wedding anniversary. I can count the number of "fights" we have had on one hand, and I'm sorry but I do not agree with the school of thinking that claims this is unhealthy for a relationship. Even the fights we have had would not be classified as such by others. It's just not how we deal with our issues. We talk about everything. Other than gifts and similar type surprises, we have no secrets. Period. We will keep yours, so don't worry, but please don't expect us to keep them from eachother. If you've told me, he knows; if you told him, I know. Plain and simple.
The only mystery left in our marriage? We don't shit in front of each other. Hell, we rarely even take a piss in front of each other...
So think about this: we openly communicate with each other, we keep zero secrets and we give each other private time when they need to use the bathroom... Also we don't do each other's laundry beyond maybe throwing a missed article in the wash with our own or moving clothes to the dryer. Otherwise he washes his and I wash mine. We share responsibility for household laundry.
I think these points are our "secrets" to a happy marriage, but alas, this is just my opinion and what has worked for us. As gross as this may sound, we still hate to be apart for more than a few hours. We are completely content to do our own thing and we do (such as me typing these thoughts out or him studying nerd stuff), but we enjoy being together even while doing separate things.
Our relationship is heading into its twelfth year; our marriage, its eleventh year and I can't imagine having spent the last decade plus any other way. I can't even begin to fathom the adventures in store for us from here as we grow and our family grows (yes, we hope to try for an addition sometime next year or the following).
To Collin, who I know has read every single word and probably even had his share of flashbacks to the big bang (try not to laugh, I can hear you in my head) that started the universe of our love, I love you more, always and forever. Thank you for being the perfect match for me in every way imaginable. Thank you for putting up with my crazy, my insecurities, and my overactive imagination. I can't imagine a life without you; past, present or future. As creepy as it is sometimes, you are in my head and completely in tune with me. I will never, ever, ever be able to fully express the endless fathoms of my love for you. I can't wait to see what you have up your sleeve for our anniversary (he has been planning this event for over two years).
There it is. It's all laid bare before your eyes. Judge me if you want, but that won't change what I have or what I have built.
If you take anything away from this, I hope it is the belief that soul mates exist (not necessarily in a romantic capacity, but they are there) and that there should be no secrets in a relationship.
Honesty is the cement slab the foundation of your love is placed upon, and without it the house that is your relationship will likely be unstable and destined to crumble.
Monday, August 3, 2015
This Paperclip Is My Grenade Pin
My house smells of chocolate and deliciousness right now. I keep taking slow deep breaths. I am salivating worse than Pavlov's dog.
All the yummy ingredients spread out on the pan (covered with parchment paper) before going in the 300° F oven for about forty minutes.
It came out of the oven a few moments ago. It's not as cluster-y as the recipe from last week but I think I know something I can try to remedy that. Next time I will give it a try and I will do my best to share the results.
I almost didn't post tonight because my laptop was having mental issues with launching Chrome... No idea what the dealio was, but after a quick reboot I was good to go.
I'm debating spending some time on my other writing project, but my brain is a little drained from work today. Change is something that is rather difficult for me to deal with, more so than I care to admit. At work I feel like change is in the air. I think what rattles me is that it doesn't feel like direct change, but more that stuff around me will be changing. It's unsettling.
So, next post will be two weeks and one day before the anniversary weekend extravaganza starts. I think this will be a great post to begin the no holds barred, tell all of the spark that started what has been the most wonderful and love filled eleven years of my life (so far).
Tonight I am making my second batch of granola and this time we're going dark chocolate. The aroma wafting from the oven is unbelievable. Like brownies, but way healthier. Just so we are all clear. This was never meant to be a foodie blog and it never will be, but I will still occasionally share the wealth of knowledge I have found and tried on Pinterest.
To be completely honest, the reason I would fail at food blogging is my focus on making the food. I am absolutely horrible about taking the pictures during the process. That said, sometimes I remember, and it just so happens I remembered tonight!
Before I can forget, this is where I got this recipe: Yummy Mummy Kitchen. Oh, and this is the recipe for the almond granola from last week: Whole and Heavenly Oven. Side note, I did not follow either of these recipes to the tee, but mostly.
Now for random pictures of me putting the granola together. (Another reason I am not a food blogger; I am no good at telling stories in between pictures of food I made.)
The first picture is all the dry goods mixed together (oats, coconut, almonds and chia seeds).
Next we have the ooey gooey chocolate mixture poured into the dry ingredients.
All mixed together. The orange bowl has sentimental value. I bought it when I was nineteen from the Dollar Store so I could make candy bar pie (cheesecake with chocolate ganache and Snickers candy bar pieces on top) for Collin's second visit.
It came out of the oven a few moments ago. It's not as cluster-y as the recipe from last week but I think I know something I can try to remedy that. Next time I will give it a try and I will do my best to share the results.
I almost didn't post tonight because my laptop was having mental issues with launching Chrome... No idea what the dealio was, but after a quick reboot I was good to go.
I'm debating spending some time on my other writing project, but my brain is a little drained from work today. Change is something that is rather difficult for me to deal with, more so than I care to admit. At work I feel like change is in the air. I think what rattles me is that it doesn't feel like direct change, but more that stuff around me will be changing. It's unsettling.
So, next post will be two weeks and one day before the anniversary weekend extravaganza starts. I think this will be a great post to begin the no holds barred, tell all of the spark that started what has been the most wonderful and love filled eleven years of my life (so far).
Wednesday, July 29, 2015
If You Don't Try You Fail
I was making up a hundred excuses as to why I was going to skip posting tonight. Mostly because I am tired; today was just one of those days. Then the more I thought about it the more I knew I needed to do this tonight. End of story. I put my big girl eye drops in and here I sit, gently stroking the keys with a tale in my mind.
This past week has been nothing if not interesting and a little conflicted.
In an effort to try to bring in some extra income I was inquiring about selling a line a products that I know and use. The more I thought about it the more it dawned on me that I should use my energy to follow a passion, not just bring in some extra change. Again, here I sit.
I am going to commit myself to making some sort of income, no matter how feeble, off of my writing skills (and now the horror of any grammatical errors that may be painfully apparent in this post pops into my mind). I may dabble in some free lance stuff; I've already wrecked my chances with one online writing firm because I rushed through the application quiz after a long and typical Tuesday. Sad fact, there is no do overs with this firm. Oh, well. There are other options in the world.
After much pushing from outside intruders, I am also working to type a book. While doing this I am researching self-publishing and may or may not send the manuscript out to some publishing houses, but first one must have a manuscript... Right? One book that I am using as a rugged guide gave me a twisted challenge: for every chapter I read of his rough and tumble book I must take the time to pen a chapter of my own. Last night I put down about one thousand words. They may be rubbish but I figure it's a healthy start.
I hope to NOT detract from my posting on here, and still plan to share my little gems with you. Hell, most of what I post on here has little to no place in the book I am working on either. I may reach out to all of you as more words find their way onto the pages to see if there is interest in being Beta-Readers for the book. As more of it blossoms I will share the subject matter of the book and let you choose from there if there is an interest for you.
All that said, let's move on to the real fun of this past week and the reason this is my first post since the 20th.
I may or may not have mentioned issues related to my right eye in the past month. Quick recap: June 27th woke up with some irritation in my eye like I had been dealing with off and on since late March; no biggie went about my day. That night woke up in severe pain as it felt like my eye was being prodded by a burning fork while shards of glass moved about. I spent most of the 28th in misery barely able to open my eye. No drops relieved the pain. Previous occurrences had me believing I was dealing with repeated sties, but I had never had them before. I went online and was happy to see my doctor had an opening on the 29th at four something.
Monday morning dawned and I was exhausted and suffering, but off to work I went with eye patch in hand (we had purchased some cheap, uncomfortable thing the day before). Looking at my monitor was nigh impossible and the fluorescent lights were like staring into the bright noon time sun. I was in agony. On a lark I called my medical provider and explained my situation to the nice gal on the other end of the phone. Miraculously they had an immediate opening if I could head over right then. I snagged Collin and off we went.
Once there the doctor checked for foreign bodies - nada. Then he checked for sties - nada. Then he did a fluoracil on the eye; this is where they put fluorescent dye on the surface of your eye and look at it with a UV light. Before this he also blessed me with numbing eye drops. This was the best feeling since before this all started. He reported the presence of three scratches on my eye: one to either side and the third (like a bastard) straight down the middle. After all this, the doctor felt it may have been a form of sicca syndrome related to my psoriasis. Sicca syndrome commonly causes dry mouth and eyes. He gave me prescription for eye drops, ordered some labs to check my immune system (psoriasis being an auto-immune issue) and referred me to ophthalmology.
Fast forward three weeks to last week. Tuesday night I woke up to the all too familiar pain. Not again. I had been pretty much symptom free since the prescription eye drops kicked in around the 1st of July. The only blessing was that my follow up with ophthalmology was in five short hours. It didn't have a chance to get as severe as the previous episode.
I went in, explained all the symptoms, sensations and pain that I had dealt with. I explained the grainy, rock-like feeling when I would wake up. I expressed the discomfort caused by light and even the movement of my eyeball. The doctor took a good look at my eye and performed another fluoracil on my eye. After all of this she informed me it was not sicca syndrome, but she knew exactly what it was.
Brace yourself, the name is pretty self-explanatory:
Reoccurring Corneal Erosion Syndrome
In layman's terms, my eyelid is trying to peal my cornea off of my eyeball. Well, at least it is with the first layer. The way she described it was a little better... I guess. The first layer of the cornea is extremely delicate and it attaches to the other layers with tiny legs or tendrils. What happens when a person has the aforementioned syndrome is that their eyelid's mucus membrane dries out (typically at night) and sticks to the cornea. When the eye moves or attempts to open without proper lubrication the eyelid begins to tear the first layer of the cornea off. Given there are so many nerves in the eyeball it is EXCRUCIATINGLY painful. Thankfully, the cornea is one of the parts of human anatomy with the fastest healing time. By the time I was at this appointment she could tell that it was already repairing itself.
I am grateful I finally have an answer as to why this was happening. Better yet, we have a treatment plan. Yes, this is something that is completely curable. It just requires me to put an ointment that has a similar consistency to antibiotic ointment in my eye, every night, before bed. This helps retain the moisture in my eye and provides a protective layer. During the day I am to administer one to two drops three to four times a day to keep the eye well hydrated. I go back for another follow up on the 10th, and barring any further incidents I just need to be sure I keep my eye ball happily hydrated as needed.
If I go in and we find that things aren't healing up as they should, the next treatment option is a contact bandage. Basically, they would place a clear lens over my eye to keep the cornea moist and protected. I would need to wear this for TWO MONTHS with visits every other week to have them change the bandage. Um, no, thank you, please.
The doctor didn't even want to talk about the next step AFTER the bandage should it also not be a viable treatment option because it would mean I get to go visit the corneal specialist. Good people I am sure, but yea, no.
She is confident the first treatment plan she has prescribed will work. I am too. So far, so good. I just need to remember to put my drops in when I am at work. Once it clears up the eye drops will be completely on an as needed basis.
With this, I had kind of taken a break from here since I spend eight hours of my day staring at a monitor for work. This is one of the things that does not help the issue. Apparently, there are a lot of things that can exacerbate this syndrome; dry air, air conditioning, heat, not blinking enough, staring at a computer screen too long, and so on.
I will keep you all posted as to how the follow up goes.
Next post: Why the hell have I never made granola before??
This past week has been nothing if not interesting and a little conflicted.
In an effort to try to bring in some extra income I was inquiring about selling a line a products that I know and use. The more I thought about it the more it dawned on me that I should use my energy to follow a passion, not just bring in some extra change. Again, here I sit.
I am going to commit myself to making some sort of income, no matter how feeble, off of my writing skills (and now the horror of any grammatical errors that may be painfully apparent in this post pops into my mind). I may dabble in some free lance stuff; I've already wrecked my chances with one online writing firm because I rushed through the application quiz after a long and typical Tuesday. Sad fact, there is no do overs with this firm. Oh, well. There are other options in the world.
After much pushing from outside intruders, I am also working to type a book. While doing this I am researching self-publishing and may or may not send the manuscript out to some publishing houses, but first one must have a manuscript... Right? One book that I am using as a rugged guide gave me a twisted challenge: for every chapter I read of his rough and tumble book I must take the time to pen a chapter of my own. Last night I put down about one thousand words. They may be rubbish but I figure it's a healthy start.
I hope to NOT detract from my posting on here, and still plan to share my little gems with you. Hell, most of what I post on here has little to no place in the book I am working on either. I may reach out to all of you as more words find their way onto the pages to see if there is interest in being Beta-Readers for the book. As more of it blossoms I will share the subject matter of the book and let you choose from there if there is an interest for you.
All that said, let's move on to the real fun of this past week and the reason this is my first post since the 20th.
I may or may not have mentioned issues related to my right eye in the past month. Quick recap: June 27th woke up with some irritation in my eye like I had been dealing with off and on since late March; no biggie went about my day. That night woke up in severe pain as it felt like my eye was being prodded by a burning fork while shards of glass moved about. I spent most of the 28th in misery barely able to open my eye. No drops relieved the pain. Previous occurrences had me believing I was dealing with repeated sties, but I had never had them before. I went online and was happy to see my doctor had an opening on the 29th at four something.
Monday morning dawned and I was exhausted and suffering, but off to work I went with eye patch in hand (we had purchased some cheap, uncomfortable thing the day before). Looking at my monitor was nigh impossible and the fluorescent lights were like staring into the bright noon time sun. I was in agony. On a lark I called my medical provider and explained my situation to the nice gal on the other end of the phone. Miraculously they had an immediate opening if I could head over right then. I snagged Collin and off we went.
Once there the doctor checked for foreign bodies - nada. Then he checked for sties - nada. Then he did a fluoracil on the eye; this is where they put fluorescent dye on the surface of your eye and look at it with a UV light. Before this he also blessed me with numbing eye drops. This was the best feeling since before this all started. He reported the presence of three scratches on my eye: one to either side and the third (like a bastard) straight down the middle. After all this, the doctor felt it may have been a form of sicca syndrome related to my psoriasis. Sicca syndrome commonly causes dry mouth and eyes. He gave me prescription for eye drops, ordered some labs to check my immune system (psoriasis being an auto-immune issue) and referred me to ophthalmology.
Fast forward three weeks to last week. Tuesday night I woke up to the all too familiar pain. Not again. I had been pretty much symptom free since the prescription eye drops kicked in around the 1st of July. The only blessing was that my follow up with ophthalmology was in five short hours. It didn't have a chance to get as severe as the previous episode.
I went in, explained all the symptoms, sensations and pain that I had dealt with. I explained the grainy, rock-like feeling when I would wake up. I expressed the discomfort caused by light and even the movement of my eyeball. The doctor took a good look at my eye and performed another fluoracil on my eye. After all of this she informed me it was not sicca syndrome, but she knew exactly what it was.
Brace yourself, the name is pretty self-explanatory:
Reoccurring Corneal Erosion Syndrome
In layman's terms, my eyelid is trying to peal my cornea off of my eyeball. Well, at least it is with the first layer. The way she described it was a little better... I guess. The first layer of the cornea is extremely delicate and it attaches to the other layers with tiny legs or tendrils. What happens when a person has the aforementioned syndrome is that their eyelid's mucus membrane dries out (typically at night) and sticks to the cornea. When the eye moves or attempts to open without proper lubrication the eyelid begins to tear the first layer of the cornea off. Given there are so many nerves in the eyeball it is EXCRUCIATINGLY painful. Thankfully, the cornea is one of the parts of human anatomy with the fastest healing time. By the time I was at this appointment she could tell that it was already repairing itself.
I am grateful I finally have an answer as to why this was happening. Better yet, we have a treatment plan. Yes, this is something that is completely curable. It just requires me to put an ointment that has a similar consistency to antibiotic ointment in my eye, every night, before bed. This helps retain the moisture in my eye and provides a protective layer. During the day I am to administer one to two drops three to four times a day to keep the eye well hydrated. I go back for another follow up on the 10th, and barring any further incidents I just need to be sure I keep my eye ball happily hydrated as needed.
If I go in and we find that things aren't healing up as they should, the next treatment option is a contact bandage. Basically, they would place a clear lens over my eye to keep the cornea moist and protected. I would need to wear this for TWO MONTHS with visits every other week to have them change the bandage. Um, no, thank you, please.
The doctor didn't even want to talk about the next step AFTER the bandage should it also not be a viable treatment option because it would mean I get to go visit the corneal specialist. Good people I am sure, but yea, no.
She is confident the first treatment plan she has prescribed will work. I am too. So far, so good. I just need to remember to put my drops in when I am at work. Once it clears up the eye drops will be completely on an as needed basis.
With this, I had kind of taken a break from here since I spend eight hours of my day staring at a monitor for work. This is one of the things that does not help the issue. Apparently, there are a lot of things that can exacerbate this syndrome; dry air, air conditioning, heat, not blinking enough, staring at a computer screen too long, and so on.
I will keep you all posted as to how the follow up goes.
Next post: Why the hell have I never made granola before??
Monday, July 20, 2015
Out of This World
The rest of our long weekend was AMAZING. It was so restful and wonderful and much needed.
Saturday I did the normal and dragged my happy ass to the gym at 5am. After my return home I made a delicious savory breakfast of hasbrowns, sausage and eggs.
We all went for a walk to get the mail and then played in the backyard for about an hour. Eventually, little miss sassitude was hitting a limit we know all too well and it was nap time. While she snoozed away Collin went to visit his grandma for a bit. After nap time we had lunch and then made off on our grand adventure for the day: IKEA.
It is a really good place to go and wander around. I like to get ideas while we are there about various updates we want to make in the coming years. The wee one enjoys walking around and touching everything within her reach. She also loves the carts for going through the show room because they have these poles that come up next to the seat with a little metal flag at the top. Her adoration for them is due to the semi flexible nature of the pole and the "boing" vibrations. I also try to take a minute to peruse the "As-is" section for anything I can do something with. This trip we struck gold since I decided to meander back into the "handy person's" corner where they keep odd shelves and excess cabinet doors.
For five bucks a piece I found these nice sized smooth, white cabinet doors. I will be using these in place of canvases for an art piece I have been wanting to do with my toddler Picasso since we re-did our room. Considering canvases of similar size are twenty to thirty dollars each, I made out like a bandit. I am hoping we can find time for the art project this coming weekend, but I need to pick up more foam brushes first.
Toddler art is awesome and with the internet at almost anyone's fingertips, projects are plentiful. I am still steadily building the digital collection of all the inventive arts and crafts we have brought home from "school." Our little Monet loves arts and crafts time and I truly hope I can always keep that passion going for her. I have no ambitions for her to become some famous artist (unless she wants to), but I know how important creativity can be for other things such as problem solving.
Late last month and earlier this month they did space theme at school and oh, what disgustingly adorable things they made. Other than Pinterest, I have no idea how they come up with all these awesome projects (I have talked to the teachers and I know when their creative tanks are getting low Pinterest is where they go). They made footprint spaceships; I like to call this the S.S. Always Right.
This next one has to be one of my all time favorites (so far); like, I kept the physical copy favorites. Side note: 95% of the art she does gets scanned and tossed otherwise there would be walls covered in it and the clutter would be a nightmare.
The Alien Inside:
Back to the master bedroom project though, I plan to order some standoff wall mounts to mount the pieces once mini Jackson Pollock and I are done.
After a busy, busy day we came home and I made dinner (fish taco salads for the adults, yummy) and the whole time the little demon was walking around saying, "Night night." It was barely 5pm. This went on for the next hour with only a mild respite during the actual meal. By six, the wee lass was beside herself with sleepiness and was becoming increasingly whiny. We are the meanest parents ever, you know, forcing our child to stay up past six on a Sausday evening... What the hell.
As you can imagine we allowed the bugger to retire for the evening and then we began what we had decided would be a grade B-D movie night. And boy, did we start it off right with Sharknado 2! It was so epic and horrible and hilarious and ridiculous. It was a masterpiece. But it coculdn't hold a candle to the second movie we watched: ZOMBEAVERS! How could a person go wrong with a movie title like that? You can't. By movie number three I was fading fast but we made it about forty five minutes to an hour into Mega Shark vs. Mecha Shark before I decided I must seek the comfort of my bed.
This movie night proved something very important to us: we can control what we eat and what we associate food wise with certain activities. As we drove home from IKEA making a plan for our evening post toddler bed time the first thing my brain thought was, "Movie night == CANDY, om nom nom nom. So disgustingly good...." Whoa unto the part of my brain who went there for the healthy woman beat the pulp out of them within a minute. Suddenly the words were coming out of my mouth, "When we stop to get the fish and chicken do you want to get some fruit to munch on with the movies?" YES! A small victory in making the right choice regardless of the situation.
So, that's what we did. we bought some red grapes and some cherries and we gnoshed on it the whole evening. It was delicious and I felt so much better for it.
Sunday was the anticlimactic day of the weekend. Where the shadows of work begin to loom on the horizon. It was still a great day. I got all the laundry done and mostly put away (I still have the kitchen towels to fold). I cleaned the garage... Again... Now that we are done with all the current projects throughout the house I don't think it will be too hard to keep the garage in good shape.After miss teething's nap we went to get gas and then visit Collin's grandma so that we could all visit. We got home and I prepped dinner, and then slagged off to the gym for another brutal work out. Both Saturday's and Sunday's included over three and a half miles on the elliptical in forty minutes. Someday I hope to translate that pace to the pavement. Some day. After the elliptical I did the normal weight machines, always striving to up the weight little by little as I become stronger.
It was 9:30 when I had the horrible realization that I would have to go back to work today. It made me sad, but all in all it wasn't that bad today. I was expecting a couple hundred emails to sort through and was pleasantly surprised to have received less than 190. I think my customer's are appreciative that I communicate my planned vacations to them as much in advance as possible (I put it down in my signature). I was able to quickly organize and respond to everything that had come in and I don't feel anymore behind than usual, so that made the afterglow of this weekend linger on, making it feel even more restful and restorative.
Makes me curious for what it will be like when I take maternity leave in the next couple years when we have baby number two... It will probably be surreal. With number one I only took two months (that was all I could afford) and it was over in a blink, but at the same time it was nice to re-enter the world (I've never been confident in my abilities to be a stay at home mom... I'd get really restless I think). At my current job we are allowed to take three months. It seems like such a long time, but in the same breath it seems like it is never enough. Blah! I don't like talking about this topic; it's a little too deep and a little to intimate, yet something that can so easily be misconstrued and twisted about.
Puppies and kitties.
I think I have earned an episode or two of anime now that I have ruffled my own feathers. First I need to get stuff together for tomorrow.
Hope you had a moderately tolerable Monday!
Saturday I did the normal and dragged my happy ass to the gym at 5am. After my return home I made a delicious savory breakfast of hasbrowns, sausage and eggs.
We all went for a walk to get the mail and then played in the backyard for about an hour. Eventually, little miss sassitude was hitting a limit we know all too well and it was nap time. While she snoozed away Collin went to visit his grandma for a bit. After nap time we had lunch and then made off on our grand adventure for the day: IKEA.
It is a really good place to go and wander around. I like to get ideas while we are there about various updates we want to make in the coming years. The wee one enjoys walking around and touching everything within her reach. She also loves the carts for going through the show room because they have these poles that come up next to the seat with a little metal flag at the top. Her adoration for them is due to the semi flexible nature of the pole and the "boing" vibrations. I also try to take a minute to peruse the "As-is" section for anything I can do something with. This trip we struck gold since I decided to meander back into the "handy person's" corner where they keep odd shelves and excess cabinet doors.
For five bucks a piece I found these nice sized smooth, white cabinet doors. I will be using these in place of canvases for an art piece I have been wanting to do with my toddler Picasso since we re-did our room. Considering canvases of similar size are twenty to thirty dollars each, I made out like a bandit. I am hoping we can find time for the art project this coming weekend, but I need to pick up more foam brushes first.
Toddler art is awesome and with the internet at almost anyone's fingertips, projects are plentiful. I am still steadily building the digital collection of all the inventive arts and crafts we have brought home from "school." Our little Monet loves arts and crafts time and I truly hope I can always keep that passion going for her. I have no ambitions for her to become some famous artist (unless she wants to), but I know how important creativity can be for other things such as problem solving.
Late last month and earlier this month they did space theme at school and oh, what disgustingly adorable things they made. Other than Pinterest, I have no idea how they come up with all these awesome projects (I have talked to the teachers and I know when their creative tanks are getting low Pinterest is where they go). They made footprint spaceships; I like to call this the S.S. Always Right.
This next one has to be one of my all time favorites (so far); like, I kept the physical copy favorites. Side note: 95% of the art she does gets scanned and tossed otherwise there would be walls covered in it and the clutter would be a nightmare.
The Alien Inside:
Back to the master bedroom project though, I plan to order some standoff wall mounts to mount the pieces once mini Jackson Pollock and I are done.
After a busy, busy day we came home and I made dinner (fish taco salads for the adults, yummy) and the whole time the little demon was walking around saying, "Night night." It was barely 5pm. This went on for the next hour with only a mild respite during the actual meal. By six, the wee lass was beside herself with sleepiness and was becoming increasingly whiny. We are the meanest parents ever, you know, forcing our child to stay up past six on a Sausday evening... What the hell.
As you can imagine we allowed the bugger to retire for the evening and then we began what we had decided would be a grade B-D movie night. And boy, did we start it off right with Sharknado 2! It was so epic and horrible and hilarious and ridiculous. It was a masterpiece. But it coculdn't hold a candle to the second movie we watched: ZOMBEAVERS! How could a person go wrong with a movie title like that? You can't. By movie number three I was fading fast but we made it about forty five minutes to an hour into Mega Shark vs. Mecha Shark before I decided I must seek the comfort of my bed.
This movie night proved something very important to us: we can control what we eat and what we associate food wise with certain activities. As we drove home from IKEA making a plan for our evening post toddler bed time the first thing my brain thought was, "Movie night == CANDY, om nom nom nom. So disgustingly good...." Whoa unto the part of my brain who went there for the healthy woman beat the pulp out of them within a minute. Suddenly the words were coming out of my mouth, "When we stop to get the fish and chicken do you want to get some fruit to munch on with the movies?" YES! A small victory in making the right choice regardless of the situation.
So, that's what we did. we bought some red grapes and some cherries and we gnoshed on it the whole evening. It was delicious and I felt so much better for it.
Sunday was the anticlimactic day of the weekend. Where the shadows of work begin to loom on the horizon. It was still a great day. I got all the laundry done and mostly put away (I still have the kitchen towels to fold). I cleaned the garage... Again... Now that we are done with all the current projects throughout the house I don't think it will be too hard to keep the garage in good shape.After miss teething's nap we went to get gas and then visit Collin's grandma so that we could all visit. We got home and I prepped dinner, and then slagged off to the gym for another brutal work out. Both Saturday's and Sunday's included over three and a half miles on the elliptical in forty minutes. Someday I hope to translate that pace to the pavement. Some day. After the elliptical I did the normal weight machines, always striving to up the weight little by little as I become stronger.
It was 9:30 when I had the horrible realization that I would have to go back to work today. It made me sad, but all in all it wasn't that bad today. I was expecting a couple hundred emails to sort through and was pleasantly surprised to have received less than 190. I think my customer's are appreciative that I communicate my planned vacations to them as much in advance as possible (I put it down in my signature). I was able to quickly organize and respond to everything that had come in and I don't feel anymore behind than usual, so that made the afterglow of this weekend linger on, making it feel even more restful and restorative.
Makes me curious for what it will be like when I take maternity leave in the next couple years when we have baby number two... It will probably be surreal. With number one I only took two months (that was all I could afford) and it was over in a blink, but at the same time it was nice to re-enter the world (I've never been confident in my abilities to be a stay at home mom... I'd get really restless I think). At my current job we are allowed to take three months. It seems like such a long time, but in the same breath it seems like it is never enough. Blah! I don't like talking about this topic; it's a little too deep and a little to intimate, yet something that can so easily be misconstrued and twisted about.
Puppies and kitties.
I think I have earned an episode or two of anime now that I have ruffled my own feathers. First I need to get stuff together for tomorrow.
Hope you had a moderately tolerable Monday!
Friday, July 17, 2015
The War of "Good" and "Evil"
In my current personal journey the good is the mindful healthy choices I make and the evil is all the mindless indulgences, no not indulgences, consumption. I find that there are certain points where I struggle with this fine line more than others.
There is a constant war in my mind between the healthy woman emerging and the fat chick in the corner. More and more the healthy woman is winning, but there are still these lapses where I swear the fat chick ties her up in the corner to make her watch while I over indulge in unearned and unnecessary "treats." Basically I catch myself mindlessly eating and there is this voice in my head screaming, "Why? Why are you doing this? What are you doing to me?"
It's sad and scary.
I recently read a blog post from another woman who has traveled a very similar and parallel road to the one I am on. She hit her goal, more or less, but she still struggles with the same situations I find myself in. She still sees the her from the start, and she too recognizes that there is no end. Ever. The best I can ever hope for is to continue and maintain. Even once I hit my goal I will still have to maintain all the results. There will never be a day where the above battle isn't happening within me.
Every now and again, when I am in my darkest of places, the fat chick begs me to give in, just give up, I will never win.
But then I have these amazing glorious moments. An amazing work out. My pants fit a little looser. I can chase my daughter without running out of breath. The healthy woman exalts. She screams from the mountain top that she is alive, she is strong and she is damn well going to win this battle. She is stronger than the fat chick could ever hope to be.
Ever.
The triumphs of the healthy woman can be seen in our summer adventures.
Today was our second visit to the Oregon Zoo. We are members so we can go whenever for free. We've gone twice in just over a month. Both visits were great weather and since the wee one hadn't had any shots today (she had her 18 month check up last time we went) she was able to walk probably about a third of the zoo. She loves it. We practically had to drag her from the lion exhibit today. She was mesmerized.
She is also infatuated with the cheetahs (any big cat really), the bears, the giraffes and the elephants. Okay, so she is mostly infatuated with the entire zoo. Below is a picture from the first visit. The cheetahs were sleeping right by the viewing glass. She wanted to say, "Hi." A lot.
Today the cheetah was also laying there, but it was awake. When it yawned and rolled over we were certain it might startle our little zoologist (I mean it's a big kitty with a big mouth and some large teeth). She wasn't phased.
Another awesome summer adventure was our outing to Silver Falls State Park. She was enthralled by the waterfall (South Falls), but once we got to the point where we were to go behind the falls she had a complete meltdown. Someday we will make it the whole way around the little loop from the top around the bottom and back up. It was a beautiful morning with the temps in the low seventies.
After our halfway hike little miss enjoyed a half hour straight of going down the slide in the shaded, deserted play ground near the swimming area. It was thirty minutes of her chanting, "Slide, slide, slide...."
She is growing so fast.
I've decided to get an undercut next time I am in my stylist's chair. I think this will help me maintain my sanity while I am growing my hair out. It's just getting to be past shoulder length. My goal is to grow it to at least between my shoulder blades. There is something I want to do with it color-wise that I need length for it to look how I want it. Plus there are some hairstyles I'd like to try out as well. So as much as I hate my hair sometimes, I am going to push through. I think the biggest issue is the fact that it is summertime and warm.
Tomorrow morning I am going to hit the gym. I get the best high from my workouts. Last night was awesome. three and a half miles on the elliptical in forty minutes, followed by thirty reps each on the inward and outward hip abduction machines at 170 lbs. Then thirty reps on the leg press at 170 lbs. and then the machines that make up the 30-minute express circuit. I felt so great afterwards. I wish I could find a way to hold onto that feeling between workouts. I could see myself easily becoming a gym junkie if there was one closer than where I go.
Now to drink the rest of my detox tea and watch some anime
There is a constant war in my mind between the healthy woman emerging and the fat chick in the corner. More and more the healthy woman is winning, but there are still these lapses where I swear the fat chick ties her up in the corner to make her watch while I over indulge in unearned and unnecessary "treats." Basically I catch myself mindlessly eating and there is this voice in my head screaming, "Why? Why are you doing this? What are you doing to me?"
It's sad and scary.
I recently read a blog post from another woman who has traveled a very similar and parallel road to the one I am on. She hit her goal, more or less, but she still struggles with the same situations I find myself in. She still sees the her from the start, and she too recognizes that there is no end. Ever. The best I can ever hope for is to continue and maintain. Even once I hit my goal I will still have to maintain all the results. There will never be a day where the above battle isn't happening within me.
Every now and again, when I am in my darkest of places, the fat chick begs me to give in, just give up, I will never win.
But then I have these amazing glorious moments. An amazing work out. My pants fit a little looser. I can chase my daughter without running out of breath. The healthy woman exalts. She screams from the mountain top that she is alive, she is strong and she is damn well going to win this battle. She is stronger than the fat chick could ever hope to be.
Ever.
The triumphs of the healthy woman can be seen in our summer adventures.
Today was our second visit to the Oregon Zoo. We are members so we can go whenever for free. We've gone twice in just over a month. Both visits were great weather and since the wee one hadn't had any shots today (she had her 18 month check up last time we went) she was able to walk probably about a third of the zoo. She loves it. We practically had to drag her from the lion exhibit today. She was mesmerized.
She is also infatuated with the cheetahs (any big cat really), the bears, the giraffes and the elephants. Okay, so she is mostly infatuated with the entire zoo. Below is a picture from the first visit. The cheetahs were sleeping right by the viewing glass. She wanted to say, "Hi." A lot.
Today the cheetah was also laying there, but it was awake. When it yawned and rolled over we were certain it might startle our little zoologist (I mean it's a big kitty with a big mouth and some large teeth). She wasn't phased.
Another awesome summer adventure was our outing to Silver Falls State Park. She was enthralled by the waterfall (South Falls), but once we got to the point where we were to go behind the falls she had a complete meltdown. Someday we will make it the whole way around the little loop from the top around the bottom and back up. It was a beautiful morning with the temps in the low seventies.
After our halfway hike little miss enjoyed a half hour straight of going down the slide in the shaded, deserted play ground near the swimming area. It was thirty minutes of her chanting, "Slide, slide, slide...."
I've decided to get an undercut next time I am in my stylist's chair. I think this will help me maintain my sanity while I am growing my hair out. It's just getting to be past shoulder length. My goal is to grow it to at least between my shoulder blades. There is something I want to do with it color-wise that I need length for it to look how I want it. Plus there are some hairstyles I'd like to try out as well. So as much as I hate my hair sometimes, I am going to push through. I think the biggest issue is the fact that it is summertime and warm.
Tomorrow morning I am going to hit the gym. I get the best high from my workouts. Last night was awesome. three and a half miles on the elliptical in forty minutes, followed by thirty reps each on the inward and outward hip abduction machines at 170 lbs. Then thirty reps on the leg press at 170 lbs. and then the machines that make up the 30-minute express circuit. I felt so great afterwards. I wish I could find a way to hold onto that feeling between workouts. I could see myself easily becoming a gym junkie if there was one closer than where I go.
Now to drink the rest of my detox tea and watch some anime
Wednesday, July 15, 2015
I'll Give You A Water Challenge...
It seems to be popular right now. I think this is a good thing. Way too many people are not drinking enough water. As I have shared before, I drink roughly my weight in ounces of water almost everyday. I start my day drinking 32-64 ounces before I even eat (even more still on the Saturday gym mornings) then proceed to drink 100-120 ounces of H2O at work and polish it off with 96 or more ounces in the evening. This is strictly my water consumption. I'm not counting my tea or coffee or milk. Just water.
Some days are harder than others, but I do find on the days where I stick to the water consumption like I should, I am much less "hungry."
The wee monster insisted for about twenty minutes straight that it was night night time. So I finally give in at 6:35 and take her to bed. I tuck her in and say my good nights. I have now spent the last thirty five minutes listening to her babble and play and laugh. All happy sounds so I do not check on her. I just let her be. This gives me confidence that when she is older the method I want to try for bed time may just work.
It's this method I read about when I was still pregnant or shortly after birthing my demon spawn... The cliff notes version is that you set a nightly quiet time, say around 7pm (depending on age of course). During this quiet time the child is to be in their room, ready for bed. They can play (quietly) or read or whatever. They are allowed to come out a certain number of times (this is set by the parents), plus one final time to say they are ready for bed.
When they are ready, you tuck them in and say good night and go back to what you were doing during quiet time.
I think this is a great idea. With toddlers I think it is very achievable, but I'll know for certain once we really start implementing it with our own.
I know it's only the middle of July but there is a part of me that feels like summer is winding down... I think that is mostly that I feel like I am catapulting through time these days. It might also be that I yearn for the cool, crisp fall weather. Oregon has some of the most gorgeous fall weather, and has always been my most loved season.
The fact that our summer has been hot and heavy straight out of the gate might also further contribute to my autumnal fantasies. Our summer normally has a slow, sporadic start. Not the case this year. We hit June and it was 90 flipping degrees almost every day of the month. July finally brought some reprieve in the last week with our highs topping out in the upper seventies and low to mid- eighties.
I was discussing this next shocking fact with my father during our monthly visit on Sunday. Next month, Collin and I will celebrate our tenth wedding anniversary. I will officially have spent a third of my life married to this amazing, loving, caring, hilarious man. Ten years... I can't imagine having spent them any other way.
Funny story about us, while I'm feeling all warm and fuzzy and such, in the early stages of our relationship (so the first four months; we were married a year after we met, after all) we both swore up and down we had no plans to get married anytime soon.... Yea, you can see how long we waited...
The significance of our anniversary date itself is something I will share in the coming weeks. I figure now is a good time to have a "lay it all out there" retrospective, because many don't know the anticlimactic whirlwind of events that led to us being Us. Some know bits and pieces, but I don't know if anyone knows the full blown story. Maybe it's time to share before any offspring (we still only have one; I'm including the future child we hope for) can read this blog. I figure by the time we reach that point in their lives this will be old and dusty like the papyrus scrolls of Egypt.
The kid is still playing and chattering away.
We have the next two days off from work. Tomorrow, we are doing something sinfully selfish. We are taking the little one to "school" (as she calls her daycare, and I am inclined to agree) and then coming home and going back to bed. We are doing nothing. Not a damn thing. We are going to spend some much needed time together relaxing. This last year has been a torrent of events that found us constantly going every time we had a day off. Whether it was packing, unpacking, looking at houses, inspecting this house, doing paperwork, painting, cleaning, removing the deck, laying down the pavers, replacing the hardware, cleaning and on and on, we have not taken a true day off at all.
Originally, we were to go camping this weekend. With an unexpected high value expense (engine rebuild in Collin's car) we just aren't in a place where I want to expend the funds for such an excursion. So, tomorrow is a completely lazy adult day. We will pick the little genius up from daycare a bit early, go to the store and then I will go to the gym. The rest of the weekend will be a family fun weekend. Friday we will make another trip to the zoo (I love having a membership!) and Saturday we may go to the BBQ/fun day at our dentist's office (celebrating ten years of being in business).
Pretty much it will be a go with the flow, relaxed weekend. With a visit or two to see Grams.
Ugh, I think I hear the asshole ice cream man.... He comes cruising through here at 7:30 in the evening with music that is blasting. The other night I was watering the lawn (which is dormant/dead at this point) in the back yard with earbuds in an screamo punk cranked up and I could hear it over that.... Somehow, magically, the tiny human slept through it.
Off to do something else.
Some days are harder than others, but I do find on the days where I stick to the water consumption like I should, I am much less "hungry."
The wee monster insisted for about twenty minutes straight that it was night night time. So I finally give in at 6:35 and take her to bed. I tuck her in and say my good nights. I have now spent the last thirty five minutes listening to her babble and play and laugh. All happy sounds so I do not check on her. I just let her be. This gives me confidence that when she is older the method I want to try for bed time may just work.
It's this method I read about when I was still pregnant or shortly after birthing my demon spawn... The cliff notes version is that you set a nightly quiet time, say around 7pm (depending on age of course). During this quiet time the child is to be in their room, ready for bed. They can play (quietly) or read or whatever. They are allowed to come out a certain number of times (this is set by the parents), plus one final time to say they are ready for bed.
When they are ready, you tuck them in and say good night and go back to what you were doing during quiet time.
I think this is a great idea. With toddlers I think it is very achievable, but I'll know for certain once we really start implementing it with our own.
I know it's only the middle of July but there is a part of me that feels like summer is winding down... I think that is mostly that I feel like I am catapulting through time these days. It might also be that I yearn for the cool, crisp fall weather. Oregon has some of the most gorgeous fall weather, and has always been my most loved season.
The fact that our summer has been hot and heavy straight out of the gate might also further contribute to my autumnal fantasies. Our summer normally has a slow, sporadic start. Not the case this year. We hit June and it was 90 flipping degrees almost every day of the month. July finally brought some reprieve in the last week with our highs topping out in the upper seventies and low to mid- eighties.
I was discussing this next shocking fact with my father during our monthly visit on Sunday. Next month, Collin and I will celebrate our tenth wedding anniversary. I will officially have spent a third of my life married to this amazing, loving, caring, hilarious man. Ten years... I can't imagine having spent them any other way.
Funny story about us, while I'm feeling all warm and fuzzy and such, in the early stages of our relationship (so the first four months; we were married a year after we met, after all) we both swore up and down we had no plans to get married anytime soon.... Yea, you can see how long we waited...
The significance of our anniversary date itself is something I will share in the coming weeks. I figure now is a good time to have a "lay it all out there" retrospective, because many don't know the anticlimactic whirlwind of events that led to us being Us. Some know bits and pieces, but I don't know if anyone knows the full blown story. Maybe it's time to share before any offspring (we still only have one; I'm including the future child we hope for) can read this blog. I figure by the time we reach that point in their lives this will be old and dusty like the papyrus scrolls of Egypt.
The kid is still playing and chattering away.
We have the next two days off from work. Tomorrow, we are doing something sinfully selfish. We are taking the little one to "school" (as she calls her daycare, and I am inclined to agree) and then coming home and going back to bed. We are doing nothing. Not a damn thing. We are going to spend some much needed time together relaxing. This last year has been a torrent of events that found us constantly going every time we had a day off. Whether it was packing, unpacking, looking at houses, inspecting this house, doing paperwork, painting, cleaning, removing the deck, laying down the pavers, replacing the hardware, cleaning and on and on, we have not taken a true day off at all.
Originally, we were to go camping this weekend. With an unexpected high value expense (engine rebuild in Collin's car) we just aren't in a place where I want to expend the funds for such an excursion. So, tomorrow is a completely lazy adult day. We will pick the little genius up from daycare a bit early, go to the store and then I will go to the gym. The rest of the weekend will be a family fun weekend. Friday we will make another trip to the zoo (I love having a membership!) and Saturday we may go to the BBQ/fun day at our dentist's office (celebrating ten years of being in business).
Pretty much it will be a go with the flow, relaxed weekend. With a visit or two to see Grams.
Ugh, I think I hear the asshole ice cream man.... He comes cruising through here at 7:30 in the evening with music that is blasting. The other night I was watering the lawn (which is dormant/dead at this point) in the back yard with earbuds in an screamo punk cranked up and I could hear it over that.... Somehow, magically, the tiny human slept through it.
Off to do something else.
Monday, July 13, 2015
Fizzled
Like any writer (I do like to occasionally use that moniker), I have found myself in the middle of a creative desert. Every time I have happened upon an oasis of humor or an anecdote of anguish it is at the most painfully inopportune time.
Times such as in the middle of the night when I am wanting desperately to sleep, or while I am at work trying to bend the space time continuum to get products to my customers last week or worse yet while I am driving to anything somewhat important.
I tried to be good and jot little notes and memos to myself to keep the various flotsam and jetsam relatively intact within my otherwise flighty brain. There has just been so much LIFE happening it has drained me of my normal creative juices. I feel them slowly restoring and recharging, but I am carefully looking around the corner for the next catastrophe.
Things can always be much worse than they are, and I know there are so many who are dealing with so much more.
I don't even remember my last post. It had to have been pre-5k.
Where are we since then?
One thing that has been drifting aimlessly through my thoughts is the things I miss about CDs.
I almost miss them as much as I miss the popularity of physical books. Don't get me wrong, I love all the thrilling and exciting free e-books I can download to my phone, but I really love the physical presence of a book. The smell. The crispness of the pages as you break the spine for its first reading. The weathered, beaten feel of an old book you have read a million times over and could probably recite from memory. There is something innately real about them.
But I stray from the topic: CD's.
Most younger than my generation may have only had limited exposure to the wonders of the compact disc. How, sometimes, you could fix a mangled and scratched disc with a bit of toothpaste and TLC. Or how we had these cleaners that were the same size as our disc man... Google that if it confuses you young whipper snappers. The attribute I loved the most?
The case inserts.
Yea, most would be filled with band pictures and cool graphics, but I was in it for the lyrics. Straight from the song writer's mind and into this little booklet of musical magic. I wanted, no, HAD to know what the correct lyrics were. One of the most infuriating things in my teenage world was buying a CD, peeling off the cellophane (that sometimes needed the jaws of life to get open), pulling out the fresh insert and finding it only filled with a couple of pictures and thank you's from the band to their mom, dog, friend, neighbors, etc. Oh the rage.
A big reason this was brought out of the deep dark vault of my mind was listening to music at work. I'd be listening to a playlist on You Tube and it would be one of those lyric videos that some teenager spent hours decoding and deciphering (I remember doing the same thing, but with cassette tapes and CDs, and just in a notebook... I didn't have a computer, let alone internet...). While watching the words flit across the screen I'd notice some glaring error that makes me wonder who the hell dropped them on their heads as children and how many times.
We're all mostly human, so I guess I can forget about it... Obviously this it the case since I didn't think to site one of the errors that set this off...
This was good. We should do this more often... Try not to stay away so long this time.
Oh wait... It was me, wasn't it?
I am trying something new this week. I will see how it goes... You will only notice if it is going well.
Isn't that the truth in most cases?
Times such as in the middle of the night when I am wanting desperately to sleep, or while I am at work trying to bend the space time continuum to get products to my customers last week or worse yet while I am driving to anything somewhat important.
I tried to be good and jot little notes and memos to myself to keep the various flotsam and jetsam relatively intact within my otherwise flighty brain. There has just been so much LIFE happening it has drained me of my normal creative juices. I feel them slowly restoring and recharging, but I am carefully looking around the corner for the next catastrophe.
Things can always be much worse than they are, and I know there are so many who are dealing with so much more.
I don't even remember my last post. It had to have been pre-5k.
Where are we since then?
One thing that has been drifting aimlessly through my thoughts is the things I miss about CDs.
I almost miss them as much as I miss the popularity of physical books. Don't get me wrong, I love all the thrilling and exciting free e-books I can download to my phone, but I really love the physical presence of a book. The smell. The crispness of the pages as you break the spine for its first reading. The weathered, beaten feel of an old book you have read a million times over and could probably recite from memory. There is something innately real about them.
But I stray from the topic: CD's.
Most younger than my generation may have only had limited exposure to the wonders of the compact disc. How, sometimes, you could fix a mangled and scratched disc with a bit of toothpaste and TLC. Or how we had these cleaners that were the same size as our disc man... Google that if it confuses you young whipper snappers. The attribute I loved the most?
The case inserts.
Yea, most would be filled with band pictures and cool graphics, but I was in it for the lyrics. Straight from the song writer's mind and into this little booklet of musical magic. I wanted, no, HAD to know what the correct lyrics were. One of the most infuriating things in my teenage world was buying a CD, peeling off the cellophane (that sometimes needed the jaws of life to get open), pulling out the fresh insert and finding it only filled with a couple of pictures and thank you's from the band to their mom, dog, friend, neighbors, etc. Oh the rage.
A big reason this was brought out of the deep dark vault of my mind was listening to music at work. I'd be listening to a playlist on You Tube and it would be one of those lyric videos that some teenager spent hours decoding and deciphering (I remember doing the same thing, but with cassette tapes and CDs, and just in a notebook... I didn't have a computer, let alone internet...). While watching the words flit across the screen I'd notice some glaring error that makes me wonder who the hell dropped them on their heads as children and how many times.
We're all mostly human, so I guess I can forget about it... Obviously this it the case since I didn't think to site one of the errors that set this off...
This was good. We should do this more often... Try not to stay away so long this time.
Oh wait... It was me, wasn't it?
I am trying something new this week. I will see how it goes... You will only notice if it is going well.
Isn't that the truth in most cases?
Wednesday, June 10, 2015
Alignment
Talking with a co-worker who is also a fellow blogger I started to feel guilty for not having posted in a while... It feels like it has been a month since my last post... I guess that's what "smoothing" can do to a person...
In all actuality it has been a mere two weeks since my last post. Still too long since I was kind of on a roll. I think.
So, the smoothing; I think it went well. we both dropped about ten pounds of water weight and god knows what in the two weeks. It (as it had in the past) helped me to realign my eating habits. Not that I was gorging myself on burgers and fries and pizza, but I was eating more than was necessary. Now, my at work snacking throughout the day consists of two pieces of fruit during the first half and two to three servings of veggies during the second half along with either hummus or peanut butter (only with carrots... it'd be weird with tomatoes). I do keep one of my homemade protein bars handy in case I really get a case of the hangries. I really don't eat much in way of breakfast during the work week. I know, this may sound like I am starving myself, but I am not. I am only eating when I am truly hungry, and considering that my job is pretty damn sedentary it's not like I need to take in a 500 calorie lunch. I feel full and satisfied. I also consume about 100-120 ozs. of water throughout my shift, and maybe a cup of coffee or green tea if I need a pick me up.
Before the smoothing cleanse I was eating a small serving of oatmeal, an apple with peanut butter, various fruit and berries, string cheese, a homemade protein bar and anything else that was offered. So and so brought donuts? Oh, hell yea. I was on it, because of course otherwise I was being "so good". Realistically, I was being good, but it was still more than I needed to consume.
Work snacks honestly are not my true demon. My true demon is evening snacks... I'd eat a delicious and healthy dinner and then two hours later when we are relaxing after the wee one went to bed I'd begin the snacking. Maybe some Cheerios, or some graham crackers with a bit of peanut butter, or a handful of goldfish. I knew it was getting out of control again, but all my efforts were half-hearted and a struggle. I knew from a not so fun experience last time we juiced/smoothed that if I over ate at any point I would be singing my praises to the porcelain gods. This was a good motivator to just cut that shit out. Now, if we are truly hungry in the evening we have an "approved" list of snacks for after dinner. Not that we won't occasionally have a small treat, but I think this is a better way to keep focused on our goals.
In case you are curious, this is what our evening snack list looks like:
- Veggies
- Apples w/ or w/o peanut butter (or this wicked fruit dip I make)
- 1/4 c. unsalted nuts
- Veggies
- Lowfat chocolate milk
- Lean meats (I am trying to keep lunch meat in the house for this; it's also good for the little monster)
- Did I mention veggies?
- Cottage cheese
- Berries
Before I even consider consulting the snack list I make sure I am not just thirsty. This means I consume roughly 32 ounces of water. If I am still feeling hungry after 15 minutes post water consumption I'll look at having a snack. My go to is chocolate milk.
Let's see... In other news, I joined a gym.
Shocked? Me too. I have never been a big fan of gyms or the atmosphere within, but I have hit a critical point in my journey where I feel like if I don't go leaping off this plateau soon I might give up. Okay, not really. But I am on the verge of throwing my hands up and going to see the doctor to see if there is something more I am missing. I have given myself a reasonable deadline. I am so close to diving off the plateau that I figure if I can't get off of it by the end of June I will make an appointment. It's literally a matter of 2-4 pounds... They feel like the heaviest and most difficult couples of pounds I have tried to drop so far. Which is saying something having lost 170 pounds so far.
Back to the gym thing. Collin has been going for a couple months and truly enjoys it and the people there so I thought what the hay, might as well give it a whirl. It kind of helps eliminate the excuses regarding the summer heat... I can run in ice and snow, but I hate anything over 80 or so. Last night was my first night, and it was awesome. The people are great. All different ages and physical abilities. It's month to month with absolutely no commitment other than the one to myself. Oh, and did I mention it's only $10 per month? Yea. That's like buying myself coffee twice... I think I can spare that bit of change for my health. They have tons of equipment and even when they are "busy" you can find an open treadmill. They also have an express circuit that is a full body workout in 30 minutes. It's comprised of 10 machines and 10 step stations. You do each one for about a minute and a half or something and when you are done you'll have worked your entire body. I tried it out after my 25 minutes on the treadmill and 5 minutes of hating myself on the stair machine... It's no wonder no one else was on them... I got in a great sweat and I truly look forward to going tomorrow.
We have divvied up the week so that I go Tuesday and Thursday and he goes Wednesday and Friday. I will continue to road run on the weekends. In fact, in just over two weeks I will be completing my first official 5k in over two years. I am super excited about it. My goal for this weekend and the next is to run 3.5 to 4 miles each run just to have the comfort of knowing I can go beyond the 5k... I know I can and have done so in the past, but it's a psychological thing I need to do.
One of a million great ideas from the world wide web (either Facebook or Pinterest, can't remember) had me spending about a half hour tonight scanning almost every piece of art that my mini Pollack has made at daycare. The purpose of this is to then make "yearbooks" (photo books) and have a compact way to save all the art work you want. Me being me loves this idea. so I have now successfully scanned all the art I could readily find. I figure I will do my best to make it a bi-weekly routine so I don't have quite so many next time.
I decided to share one of her masterpieces with you all. Hopefully some jackass doesn't try to print it on canvas and sell it for $90k.... (current events regarding Suicide Girls).
Kitteh! Which, according to her when she is mocking Spaz, kittehs say, "Nao!"
Lord know when or what the next one will be about, but I hope you come back for it.
(Did you notice I finally updated the layout/design?? The background is one of my original digital pieces.)
Tuesday, May 26, 2015
Flush, Cleanse, Repeat
My system is telling me that it's that time again to do a cleanse/detox/flushing of my system. I've been feeling a mixture of bleh and whackadoodle for the past couple weeks. I was chocking that up to the training/jogging but I think it's more.
For the next two weeks (we are have completed day three) we are doing a modified juicing that I prefer to call smoothie-ing... Doesn't quite roll off the tongue as well, does it? How about smoothing? Yea, we are smoothing... In a way that is exactly it.
We are replacing daytime meals and snacks with whole fruit smoothies. This way we get ALL the goodness of the fruits, veggies and greens. On an off the wall side note, unlike in elementary school, in the smoothie world yellow and blue do not make green. I was putting together a green smoothie mix and decided, "Hey, why not throw in some blueberries..." Yea, it came out purple... Because that's what blueberries do.
Today's smoothie was a delicious tropical concoction with mango, kale, spinach, arugula, swiss chard (all of these greens were "baby"), pineapple, kiwi, banana and I think a few strawberries. I just used a water base and added some vanilla protein powder. My not so "green" one from yesterday was all the baby greens (I got a big bag of the mix at Costco) with kiwi, cucumber, pineapple and the damn blueberries.
We have been having light snacks of apples or carrots and a little hummus just to help curb the hanger or as I like to call it hungry rage.
Speaking of hummus, this weekend when I went to make some I found that I only had one can of chickpeas and my recipe calls for two and I didn't want to halve the recipe (I actually have it already calculated but I know that I want a full batch). So, I substituted a can of great northern beans in for the second can of chickpeas. It gave the hummus an even creamier texture than I could have imagined. So good.
It was hard to slither out of bed this morning. We had an amazing and productive yet somewhat relaxing weekend. We took Friday off and busted our asses while the wee one was at "school" to get her room and the hall bath painted. They were the last two rooms and it was an amazing accomplishment to get them done. We also hung the new mirror in the powder room ($10 at IKEA) and just tidied up overall. We then tried out this nice little bar and grill near us and we were glad we did. Great food and they are family friendly so bye-bye Denny's! (We are still getting our bearings in town and that was the only "safe" family restaurant we knew of that could guarantee food the tornado would eat.)
Saturday we went to Cabela's and bought a nice family sized tent to replace the 2 person tent we ditched when we moved in November. After that we went to Dutch Bros. and coffeed it up including a Carmelizer for my bestie on her big three-oh birthday. Now this may not sound super special but this Carmelizer had to make it 60+ miles surrounded by ice in a cooler to get to said birthday girl along with twenty goofy balloons. It would have been thirty but twenty is the limit in the back of Jude (our Ford Fiesta hatchback). The smile on her face and the hugs made it all worth it! Then once we got back closer to home we went to Portland Running Company and spent some time getting analyzed and trying on different shoes. The analysis is essentially they evaluate your stride and movement in different types of shoes. After four or five pairs we each found the One. Mine are Asics (a stray from my normal Nikes) and Collin got a pair of New Balance (he's vacillates between Asics and Nikes normally). If you are inclined to running and haven't taken the time to do this at your local running store you are missing out. I have taken the new shoes out on a couple jogs now and I am in heaven. They feel like they were tailored to my feet and I probably never would have found them on my own.
Sunday I (we) hit the burnt out stage from going, going, going the past two days. I dragged myself out of bed for a short run and subsequently got a mild chill from it. We went for a two mile walk as a family. We went to the store and we went to visit Collin's grandma. The tiny one was a bit startled to see Grams in bed, normally she is sitting in her wheel chair. Grams was tired and still fighting off a bug so we didn't stay too long. Afterwards we went home and I prepped the next two weeks of smoothie packets and then sort of fizzled out. I was chilled and tired and just not feeling too great. I dozed in and out on the couch for a couple hours. Collin tried to convince me to go upstairs, but I wasn't having it. After I was semi-recharged we made one more outing to the store and then settled in for the evening to relax and cuddle.
Yesterday was the great end to the long weekend. I got to see my bestie and her whole clan and then Collin and I found out that we could buy the demon cat's stuff at PetSmart for the same price as Petco (I honestly don't know where my preference came from). It's way closer than any of the Petco locations so it works.
And now I am running out of steam to type this. The first day back at work after any length of time off is like the transition stage of labor; you're in agony and you just aren't sure you can make it through.
I think I am going to snack on some greek yogurt and cherries or some carrots and hummus... Either way it's time for the nightly detox tea! (Yogi brand makes their's in a K-cup!)
**** I did not proof read any of this... Not enough focus.****
For the next two weeks (we are have completed day three) we are doing a modified juicing that I prefer to call smoothie-ing... Doesn't quite roll off the tongue as well, does it? How about smoothing? Yea, we are smoothing... In a way that is exactly it.
We are replacing daytime meals and snacks with whole fruit smoothies. This way we get ALL the goodness of the fruits, veggies and greens. On an off the wall side note, unlike in elementary school, in the smoothie world yellow and blue do not make green. I was putting together a green smoothie mix and decided, "Hey, why not throw in some blueberries..." Yea, it came out purple... Because that's what blueberries do.
Today's smoothie was a delicious tropical concoction with mango, kale, spinach, arugula, swiss chard (all of these greens were "baby"), pineapple, kiwi, banana and I think a few strawberries. I just used a water base and added some vanilla protein powder. My not so "green" one from yesterday was all the baby greens (I got a big bag of the mix at Costco) with kiwi, cucumber, pineapple and the damn blueberries.
We have been having light snacks of apples or carrots and a little hummus just to help curb the hanger or as I like to call it hungry rage.
Speaking of hummus, this weekend when I went to make some I found that I only had one can of chickpeas and my recipe calls for two and I didn't want to halve the recipe (I actually have it already calculated but I know that I want a full batch). So, I substituted a can of great northern beans in for the second can of chickpeas. It gave the hummus an even creamier texture than I could have imagined. So good.
It was hard to slither out of bed this morning. We had an amazing and productive yet somewhat relaxing weekend. We took Friday off and busted our asses while the wee one was at "school" to get her room and the hall bath painted. They were the last two rooms and it was an amazing accomplishment to get them done. We also hung the new mirror in the powder room ($10 at IKEA) and just tidied up overall. We then tried out this nice little bar and grill near us and we were glad we did. Great food and they are family friendly so bye-bye Denny's! (We are still getting our bearings in town and that was the only "safe" family restaurant we knew of that could guarantee food the tornado would eat.)
Saturday we went to Cabela's and bought a nice family sized tent to replace the 2 person tent we ditched when we moved in November. After that we went to Dutch Bros. and coffeed it up including a Carmelizer for my bestie on her big three-oh birthday. Now this may not sound super special but this Carmelizer had to make it 60+ miles surrounded by ice in a cooler to get to said birthday girl along with twenty goofy balloons. It would have been thirty but twenty is the limit in the back of Jude (our Ford Fiesta hatchback). The smile on her face and the hugs made it all worth it! Then once we got back closer to home we went to Portland Running Company and spent some time getting analyzed and trying on different shoes. The analysis is essentially they evaluate your stride and movement in different types of shoes. After four or five pairs we each found the One. Mine are Asics (a stray from my normal Nikes) and Collin got a pair of New Balance (he's vacillates between Asics and Nikes normally). If you are inclined to running and haven't taken the time to do this at your local running store you are missing out. I have taken the new shoes out on a couple jogs now and I am in heaven. They feel like they were tailored to my feet and I probably never would have found them on my own.
Sunday I (we) hit the burnt out stage from going, going, going the past two days. I dragged myself out of bed for a short run and subsequently got a mild chill from it. We went for a two mile walk as a family. We went to the store and we went to visit Collin's grandma. The tiny one was a bit startled to see Grams in bed, normally she is sitting in her wheel chair. Grams was tired and still fighting off a bug so we didn't stay too long. Afterwards we went home and I prepped the next two weeks of smoothie packets and then sort of fizzled out. I was chilled and tired and just not feeling too great. I dozed in and out on the couch for a couple hours. Collin tried to convince me to go upstairs, but I wasn't having it. After I was semi-recharged we made one more outing to the store and then settled in for the evening to relax and cuddle.
Yesterday was the great end to the long weekend. I got to see my bestie and her whole clan and then Collin and I found out that we could buy the demon cat's stuff at PetSmart for the same price as Petco (I honestly don't know where my preference came from). It's way closer than any of the Petco locations so it works.
And now I am running out of steam to type this. The first day back at work after any length of time off is like the transition stage of labor; you're in agony and you just aren't sure you can make it through.
I think I am going to snack on some greek yogurt and cherries or some carrots and hummus... Either way it's time for the nightly detox tea! (Yogi brand makes their's in a K-cup!)
**** I did not proof read any of this... Not enough focus.****
Thursday, May 21, 2015
I... I Keep On Running
I think I am hitting the point in the C25K app where I am either going to push myself and power through or I am going to stop using it and focus on improving my pace using one set of interval times. For my overall goal, I want to complete another half marathon before my next birthday (in about eight months. Along the way I intend to do a 10k or two for fun and measurement. I definitely want to do a Thanksgiving 10k. It makes the meal that day so much more enjoyable.
Back to the current situation though. This weeks intervals feel like they are very close to the edge of being too much, but this could also be the weather today. Tuesday night was cool and cloudy and I felt amazing as I ran. Today, I still felt amazing but it was about fifteen degrees warmer and sooo humid and balmy feeling. It didn't really wreck my pace but it still was not as awesome as Tuesday; it was off by about twenty seconds per mile. I guess I should elaborate on the intervals; this week is five minute brisk walk warm up, 90 seconds of jogging/90 seconds of brisk walking followed by three minutes jogging/three minutes brisk walking. This is repeated twice. I found I feel best doing the 90/90 split. The three minutes is really close to my limit, and then the three minute walking is kind of blah for me.
Last week I really found that I felt great doing the 90/90 split and wanted to keep going beyond the thirty one minutes designated for the workout (on C25K). Next week will get more intense with the intervals. After the warm up it's jog for three then walk for 90 seconds, jog for FIVE and then walk for two and a half, jog for three and then walk another 90 before finally jogging for five, falling into a ditch and dying... Okay, dramatic, yes. I know.
I really want to see how much I can handle without going beyond the point of safety, so I am going to give week four a try and see how I feel. For the long term goal of getting my distance up for a half I think I will stick to a 90/90 or maybe two minutes jogging to 90 seconds walking.. We shall see.
Work was a little rough this week, but that is my lot being in the customer service world. Anyone who is working or has worked in this realm can understand; my job is to help my customers get there shit done, on time. When corporate politics start to interfere with that I get a little ragey. Some eff bombs were dropped (not to anyone in particular, just while venting to teammates).
The thing that helped me make it through today, which was the roughest of the week, was this face:
Back to the current situation though. This weeks intervals feel like they are very close to the edge of being too much, but this could also be the weather today. Tuesday night was cool and cloudy and I felt amazing as I ran. Today, I still felt amazing but it was about fifteen degrees warmer and sooo humid and balmy feeling. It didn't really wreck my pace but it still was not as awesome as Tuesday; it was off by about twenty seconds per mile. I guess I should elaborate on the intervals; this week is five minute brisk walk warm up, 90 seconds of jogging/90 seconds of brisk walking followed by three minutes jogging/three minutes brisk walking. This is repeated twice. I found I feel best doing the 90/90 split. The three minutes is really close to my limit, and then the three minute walking is kind of blah for me.
Last week I really found that I felt great doing the 90/90 split and wanted to keep going beyond the thirty one minutes designated for the workout (on C25K). Next week will get more intense with the intervals. After the warm up it's jog for three then walk for 90 seconds, jog for FIVE and then walk for two and a half, jog for three and then walk another 90 before finally jogging for five, falling into a ditch and dying... Okay, dramatic, yes. I know.
I really want to see how much I can handle without going beyond the point of safety, so I am going to give week four a try and see how I feel. For the long term goal of getting my distance up for a half I think I will stick to a 90/90 or maybe two minutes jogging to 90 seconds walking.. We shall see.
Work was a little rough this week, but that is my lot being in the customer service world. Anyone who is working or has worked in this realm can understand; my job is to help my customers get there shit done, on time. When corporate politics start to interfere with that I get a little ragey. Some eff bombs were dropped (not to anyone in particular, just while venting to teammates).
The thing that helped me make it through today, which was the roughest of the week, was this face:
Knowing that this little goofball is waiting for me to come pick her up from "school" each day is all I need to keep going. This was from our dollar store dress up "party" we had this past weekend. She loves her wings and to wear costumes. She is definitely ours.
This morning before we left she found her ducky. It kills me, when she "quacks" she sounds French. She's walking around swinging the duck saying, "Qua' qua'." Her vocabulary and word association is amazing for her age. Yet another reason her teachers tend to forget she is barely a year and a half old. Most of her classmates are two.
Oh, so I got my official Myers Briggs test results. I am a rare bird indeed. I tested as an INTJ, but barely. I was only one point over the line from INFJ as I had tested as before. The administrator believes that I must have felt more Thinking than Feeling the day I took the test. Also, since I took it at work that could have had some bearing on it as well. Regardless which side of the line I fall on with that specific preference I fall into a group of people who make up 1.4 to 2.4% of the world's population. Kind of nuts, right?
Now that I have a more professional explanation of the types, I can see how I go back and forth between thinking and feeling.
I for introvert; I charge my batteries by being alone and doing my own thing. Too much social interaction is draining.
N for iNtuition; I take in data and analyze it by looking at the big picture rather than just the single instance presented to me. I take this one thing, down here and I explode it into the whole cycle.
T for Thinking and F for Feeling; with the thinking I make decisions based on logic and facts presented to me whereas the feeling part of me makes decisions based on emotional reaction and other people's thoughts and opinions. (I can totally see how I may vacillate {love that word} between the two preferences depending on situation}.
J for Judging; the most misunderstood preference. In fact I think I may have described this incorrectly in my last post. This preference is based on how I like to complete a task once I have taken in the data and made a decision; I am a list person. I know, I know, for anyone who knows me this is no shock. I like lists and check lists and schedules and timelines. Prime example; I am off work tomorrow and have HUGE list of tasks I want to complete while the wee one is at school. I'm a planner; I will use any tool I can to make sure I get shit done. Lists are a key tool for me.
Now to start re-watching Amnesia. It's an interesting twelve episode anime series I stumbled upon on Crunchyroll. It is one that leaves you thinking so I want to re-watch it to see if I catch more things the second time around.
I'm thinking it's time for a new layout. I think I will be working on a new design this weekend. (the design currently in the background is not mine) OOOOOOO!!! I think I have an idea... Stay tuned!
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